Past Tense by Lee Child

Past Tense by Lee Child
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I think that this book tries too hard to be a script for TV. There are way too many adjectives, verbs, and thought processes. Every single minute action seems to be commented upon with military precision. And I’m not entirely too convinced about the police’s cavalier attitude towards Reacher’s good Samaritan actions. It’s like they have no backbone. I also thought that some scenarios were just too predictable, and when these moments did occur, my anticipation of them just flew by in a flash. Character like Amos and Castle were too similar and just blended into a category of ‘Other People that Reacher talked to’ for a while. The dialogue between Patty and Shorty was much more convincing. I know the protagonist had purpose here but it looks like the whole series is based on an ex-solider wandering about poking his nose into situations that he sees and makes things right in his own ‘special’ way. I’m not sure that it’s an appealing saga that I would want to follow.

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"Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn."

-Mahatma Gandhi.

It’s amazing what a good night of sleep will do to you. Sometimes you’ve just got to give up your body to natural rest to allow it to repair itself. Some people can just fight through it with just a short pause; while others know that they need to reset and they can’t continue otherwise. It’s amazing where this morning energy comes from. I’m not sure about dying every night though. There’s certain aspects about the past that you must retain in order to progress and you need to use this knowledge to better yourself rather than to learn it each day. But what does happen when we sleep? Maybe we drift from body to soul without even realising it; and occasionally we pick this up when we wake by recalling fragments of dreams. In this sense, everyone is connected to everyone because everyone is one. But would you want to take responsibility for it, or do you have a choice?

The Battle of Bosworth

I’m off on a little day trip to Ashby-de-la-Zouch. I’m trying to visit the castle, and on this occasion I’ve managed to find a car park space but the castle is closed. I’ve walked all around the outside and admired it from outside the grounds but there’s no other entrance. I retreat to the pub to plan my next steps. Over a pint in the beer garden, I discover the new opening times and try to discover another nearby venue to visit. The Battle of Bosworth Heritage Centre seems to be the nearest place to visit, and although I don’t get free entry I do get a discount. I fire up the sat-nav, and soon I’m in a gravel car park next to a set of converted barns and red-bricked buildings. Inside, as well a period armour and artefacts on display, there’s a brilliant interactive projector displaying the tactics of each of the different armies. After I’ve finished learning, I opt for a breath of fresh air and decide to take a trail around the country park. 

 

What I Really Believe

I believe in Christmas trees. There’s something magical about them but you can’t expect them to materialise on their own. I believe in true love and that the world can be a bleak place if you don’t attempt to seek out companionship. I believe that the world is full of cruelty and hardship and that it’s our duty to shape it otherwise, and that it’s down to each individual to find their own path and create their success. I believe that if you want something, you’ve got to put the effort in to obtain it and don’t rely on others to do it for you. You might need to acquire their experience and expertise but ultimately it’s down to you to make it happen. I believe that COVID isn’t a natural phenomenon but no-one’s going to own up to such devastation. I believe that there’s a lot more that we can do to protect our planet but governments need to lead the way by dictating how we act rather than creating taxes and forcing companies to put prices up. 

Musing Around the Museum

While we’re here, we take a quick look around the railway memorabilia inside the museum. There’s a donation to get in and it consists mainly of two or three rooms joined together, mainly with large models of locomotives and pictures of team trains and volunteers mounted on the wall. I’ve got no idea why this particular sign caught my attention. Maybe I was baffled at the time that bridges couldn’t suffice to carry a motor car, but then it could be a small bridge solely for the purpose of allowing a farmer to access his property from one side of the line to the other. The museum is also big on signage and preserves posters advertising destinations to day-trippers and tourist, as well as a showcase of tools used to preserve the railway alongside everyday artefacts of their time. You certainly get a sense of a time gone by but maybe they’ve overdone the preservation a bit. 

A Mischievous Map

Don’t waste your money (or your luggage allowance)! The free visitor’s map that we picked up in the arrivals hall of Jersey airport was much more useful than this waste of paper. Having bought this directly off the Ordnance Survey website, I was under the impression that this was one of their products but it turned out to be published by the State of Jersey with a similar key. A blend of greens makes it difficult to distinguish small roads from footpaths, while cycle routes aren’t numbered or displayed at all. Places of interest seem to be disguised in a weird black font in a blue box which seems to just blend into the map and makes them difficult to find rather than the traditional star system that’s used in the OS Explorer series maps. Also, there's no online version and country pubs aren’t displayed at all. The attached map of St. Helier is unnecessarily huge and looks more like a map for the town planner rather than a leisure one. The whole thing needs to be re-designed. 

Pissing around the Platform

My friend wanted to visit this place in memory of his dad. It’s a bit of the way out from the town, and it’s a shame that he didn’t mention it sooner as we could have made it the first stop on the bus and everyone could have visited. We walked down a wooden corridor of steps and onto the platform. As it was, the buffet bar was closed for the afternoon as it was preparing for an evening event. We had a look through the window, and it looked nicely preserved. A terminating train came in and my friend located the buffet car and persuaded the guard to sell us a couple of bottles. We walked around watching passing trains with plastic cups but it didn’t feel right. A few months later, I recognise the station’s entrance right away on a TV show and identify the station before confirming it on the closing credits. ‘I’ve been there’ I say. 

Seated Self-Righteousness

 A slightly athletic bald older man approaches with white sideburns. He tries to keep himself in shape but suffers slight mobility problems owing to old age. He walks around slowly with a sense of ownership of everything and self-righteousness. His head is a perfect egg with stuck-out ears to receive the smallest of remarks which he tries to translate as smuttily as possible. He speaks slowly in an entitled voice about topics fifty years ago as if it’s current news and likes to keep an eye out on everyone. Be prepared for a long and drawn-out conversation at the most inappropriate of times with plenty of slow guffaws. Occasionally he’ll venture some interesting information, usually scouted out from Facebook. He’s always got something to say on everything and would rather be a critic than part of the solution. He’s someone that you’d really enjoy watching them trying to squirm themselves out of a sticky situation and see justice being served.

Northern Star at the Needle & Pin, Loughborough

Once we’d finished at Wetherspoons, it was time to cross the road and head all the way into the next pub. But why use the pelican crossing 100 yards down the road when you can stagger across a busy bus route? Once we’d made it safely inside, we found that other members of our party had beaten us to it. We ignore our surrounds for a moment to take in the bar. It’s located in a tiny corridor at the far end of the building. Four ales sit on top of an exposed brick wall separated only by polished cuts of beech. There’s a nearby bookshelf but the point of interest is the beers on the keg T-bar. One of these beers is brewed in our home town, yet this pub, which is sixty miles away from the brewery, is the first pub that we’ve come across that has it available. We sit on the small pew and put our feet up under the tiny tables to ponder this. 

 

Why are Machines getting Thicker?

Last month, Alexa decided to stop reading my emails. While I thank her for not invading my privacy, I still find it strange that there’s no option to allow this to continue and that the decision has been taken for me without giving me any choice in the matter. It might have been nice for her to give me more notice too. Some people might even depend on this service, such as those who have difficulty with sight; and this could be a major blow for people with sight problems. You’d think that technology would move forward rather than backwards. Perhaps the complexity of emails meant that Alexa struggled between text and graphics and read out binary code when attempting to describe pictures. Or perhaps people weren’t listening to the whole e-mail and skipped over vital information. More importantly, we don’t know why this feature has been suspended. Perhaps Alexa is getting too clever for her own good. 

Fuller's Hop Tropic at the Old Joint Stock, Birmingham

This classic pub is full of iconic features. An island bar dominates the room with handpumps on every side which can be a bit inconvenient when deciding what to order. Raised tables are placed next to the windows to allow office workers a view of the outside world while relaxing with a pint and a pie (of which I must get round to trying!). The remaining space is taken up by raised tables, huge paintings with golden frames and chandeliers hanging down from the ceiling. Upstairs is a balcony with regular seating while behind this lies a small theatre that runs a regular programme. Back downstairs, there’s more seating designed for intimate conversation, and there’s even a small courtyard if you feel the need for a puff. And just through here you can exit via the rear and end up in a completely different pub on the opposite side of the alleyway.

Security Alerts

Security seems to be a big deal on the internet. We appreciate that it’s there to protect us, but when we know that we’re not committing fraud and that it’s our own account, it’s just annoying. Why do our passwords have to be so long? Why does the whole thing have to be delayed while we wait for a text to arrive? You wouldn’t wait to be verified to gain entry to your home because you have a key, so why should this virtual instrument be any different? Maybe on-line life would be much easier if computers had a lock built into the keyboard or be powered by a USB device. Some people are relying on digital methods such as passcodes and fingerprints to gain entrance. That’s fine too, but at least we don’t get an e-mail or notification sent to our phone every time we do it. Banks seem to be more trusting with cardholders these days through contactless payments, so why can’t websites?

Fyne Ales Double or Nothing at the Head of Steam, Birmingham

With a name like that, you’d think the pub would have a big railway theme but the truth is far from it. This place is quiet and cosy during the day but it’s a popular nightspot for groups with its long tables laid out like a beer hall in what is essentially the building’s porch. Above this is a locked drinks cabinet filled with bottles and lights to suggest to patrons what they could drink next. Hidden on top these is a bunch of leather cases which are meant to portray luggage but it’s difficult to see them in dark light. Upstairs is a square bar surrounded with plush seats. Overhead piping is on display to give the impression that steam is passing over us to somewhere useful. One could hope that it’s to vent a fermenter but the beers on sale here are quite interesting.  There’s a further raised area near the window for those who like to be seated in the warm. 

Coffee Shop #dreamdiary 122

I’m inside the tower of an historic building. Inside, the walls are of a straight grey with no signs of brickwork at all. In the centre is a large hole with blue rope ladders to ascend to the lower floor. At the bottom is plush seating and to one side is a counter with a glass top and a table to the side. Beyond this is a large barista coffee machine. It all seems very odd that this is here. Surely there must be some kind of service door to allow people to come and go or even for the coffee shop to take deliveries. There’s a large set of brown double doors to the left but they’re firmly bolted. Maybe I’ve arrived too early. Suddenly a thin silvery-blonde woman wearing a green apron pops up from behind the counter. ‘What would you like?’ she asks. I ask for the way out.    

Bedlam Wilde at the Keg and Comfort, Wolverhampton

We step off the bus and gather outside a strange bricked building with white window framing. It looks a bit out of place as a standalone building, but inside it’s quite roomy. There’s groups of plush chairs surrounding coffee tables by the windows and the bar is quite small. On the wall adjacent to it is this huge clock which looked quite impressive at the time with its different bottles but it’s shame that the paint is peeling. It’s as if someone’s spilt the beers over the face as they tried to fix them on. Next to the bar are the kegs which are painted black and are converted into tables for people to gather round when there’s no seats or when they want to be closer to the bar. We take our drinks to a small area hidden at the back of the room which looks like a former office. It’s lined with sofas and a bookcase filled with board games.

Brew 61

Redditch & Bromsgrove CAMRA paid a visit to Upton Warren in September to check out an up-and-coming brewery named Brew 61. Brewer Tim Dunkley has been practising his hobby on his family farm and decided to begin brewing commercially last year. He was very keen to show members around his new site and talk about his venture. He owns eight fermenters and is producing around 25 barrels a week. The current brewery is version four and was previously operating in a 15 square foot workshop. Four core beers are being produced which are named to reflect the neighbouring farm. They include a golden session ale named Greenfields Gold, an IPA called Spring Meadow, a light ale titled Grazing Girls and a second IPA named Hop On. There are also plans to produce a stout in the winter. The beers have been well received in both bottles and casks and have been spotted around local pubs in the branch such as the Nevill Arms in New End, the Hanbury Turn in Bromsgrove, Vaughan’s in Redditch and the Rose & Crown in Feckenham. They’re also stocked at Decanter in Bromsgrove or you can buy and collect direct from the brewery through their website: www.brew61.co.uk 

Vaulting to the Post Office Vaults

There’s a staircase that just drops right into the ground. It’s the ultimate test of whether you’re sober enough to be served, and if you hit the floor then you’re out. But if you enter via the rear, you only have to walk down a slope and through the door and the bar’s right in front of you. Seating can be sparse, and three solo people sitting on each table is enough to fill the bar up and you’ve got to wander how the staff can cope when there’s a rush on. There’s also a traditional bar billiards table that takes up a bit of space. But it’s a bar which is handy to pop into if you’ve just missed your train and you’ve got a little bit of breathing space before the next one. Just beware that you might be tempted to miss the next one too as you’re usually guaranteed to bump into someone that you know on your way out.

 

The stonemaid #empress 9

Zhong wondered off down the passage. It was at least a square forty feet. Along the way, lanterns had hastily been fixed into the sides and workmen were on ladders hoisting buffers into place. They looked at him as he passed but saw him no more than a man on his way to complete a job. After all, what harm could he do to the empress? Occasionally, a cart would pass carrying manure. As Zhong progressed, he passed more workers shovelling the manure to the sides as it looked like they were awaiting an empty cart. Zhong kicked himself as he realised that if he had waited longer, he could have hitched a ride on an empty one. The passageway grew wider and wider, until one time it opened up into a giant hole where daylight poured in. As he passed underneath, he saw the occasional dweller peek over the edge above. 

Insight Guides: Great Breaks Jersey

Insight Guides: Great Breaks Jersey by Insight Guides
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This little book has much to get the reader excited about. It’s divided the island into itineraries that can be taken via car, but it also keeps in mind that not everyone has access to a car when they’re sightseeing and keeps alternative transport in mind, particularly when it comes to suggesting walks. The history is brief but adequate and lists each feature in both its historical and modern cultural context. The book certainly doesn’t cover everything, but it’s got just the right amount of information to get you up and running with the basics of the island, and web links are supplied to encourage the reader to get the latest information on each topic, and suggests a wide range of activities for both dry and wet outcomes. The maps are heavily laden with features and suggested route, and the guide is aptly illustrated on every page to get the reader excited about what to expect. Time to get packing.

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The Goes Wrong Show: Series 2

I was disappointed with this series. It opened strongly but the laughs were as rushed as the end of the first episode. It was great to escalate the off-screen tension between Chris and Robert but it all became too child-like to watch in “The Most Lamentable”. Here, there’s so much that could have gone wrong but didn’t. The antics returned to better form in the prison break play even though the script was weak and was probably something that you’d expect to see in a TV movie. But a showcase of characters in the final two episodes were awful and lacked many opportunities for disaster to occur. The fairy ballet seemed to work but the rest was a waste of screentime; especially the one-man circus which went on for far too long. It would have been more fun if the characters had tried to squeeze these performances in between full episodes. There were so many sets that could have been produced but weren’t. The original formula worked well but in this series they needed better stunts to make it work as the gags were too predictable. 

Purity Bunny Hop at Pure Craft Bar and Kitchen, Birmingham

It’s quite a loud and modern bar, and its exterior is quite deceiving from what’s inside, almost as if you’ve stepped into a prohibition era. The tables are long and are set up like a beer hall to encourage groups and people to congregate together rather than smaller groups of individuals. It’s all about a sharing experience. There’s a mixture of bright lights placed over tables and dimmed gangways so that everything blends into the background once you’re seated to allow you to focus on your party. Overhead are sets of giant pipes to give the impression that you’re underneath some giant industrial machine. Sadly, the beer is overpriced compared to where it’s served elsewhere, but you’re paying for the location and atmosphere as well as the product. I purchase my beer separate to the group as I’m only here for the beer. My tour is ending as my company’s party is beginning.

What is your "I can't believe that happened on our vacation" event?

It’s not so much a specific event in so much as something happened, it’s more how people react when they’re on holiday. It’s time to explore and you might find yourself venturing into somewhere that you normally wouldn’t have the courage to think about. And because you’re not local and you know you’re leaving, you might think it’s OK for someone else to sort out your mess. It’s great that people switch off and forget about the outside world, but there’s still people to interact with which needs consideration. It’s great if you’re having a good time but it’s not so good if your actions are wrecking other people’s experiences. The world doesn’t just stop because you’re in a different place. It’s as if all the senses of the mind have fled. I suppose it’s in the wording of the first two syllables of the word. That said, some trips do change people and they learn important lessons. It’s up to them whether they apply them when they return home. 

Orkney Wave Breaker Blonde at the Lynch Gate Tavern, Wolverhampton

John apologises but explains that he’s been invited out to someone’s party for the evening, but he’s determined to give me as much of a guest of honour’s tour as he can. He heads home to change while we pop into a city centre pub to wait for him. From the outside, the pub looks like an out-of-place townhouse, but once you’re in it resembles something out of a Harry Potter movie. It just screams comfort and security with plush lounge chairs in both the upstairs and downstairs bars, though it’s annoying to have to fetch beer from the upstairs bar and bring it back down again when you’ve got a nice spot. I spy some local produce and splash out on a round of pork pies with the drinks. We chat amicably about ourselves and what we get up to, then it’s time to board a train to Birmingham where John will alight at a different station and find us.   

 

"Some days you learn from a book; other days you learn from hours of practice; and then there are the times you're so embarrassed by something you know you'll never do it again."

-Michael Phelps.

Everybody learns in different ways. You might take a philosophical approach, or you might need some practice or practical education to home your craft. You might be a good footballer but you might need a certain mindset to become a great one which might be something that you can’t gain in the field. Or you might be brilliant at absorbing information but you need the co-ordination to put it into practice during a training session before you can use it. But people should also learn from their mistakes. Sometimes there’s no manual for the task that you want to do (or at least not at the time) and you have to work out the best way to complete the task yourself. You might even want to approach others to ask or even pay for their experience and skills. But there are also things that you wouldn’t want to do again and hopefully you can take steps to avoid them in the future. 

Banks's Sunbeam at the Stiles, Wolverhampton

The festival venue is a colourful one. It’s split into two rooms and there’s also a few studios open for local artists to showcase their work. More familiar people are piling in but I’ve been here for a few hours and I’ve more or less finished the beers that I want to sample. John is up for giving me a local tour. I’m about ready for a change of scenery so we walk around the corner to The Stiles. It’s an old red-brick Banks’s pub with a large beer garden and a bowls field. It’s been taken on by a Polish couple who are big on building a sharing and caring community and Polish cuisine is served alongside regular staples. Inside it’s a bit dreary; there’s green walls with Victorian photographs in frames on display. The bar is quite narrow, but outside there is a terrace with colourful canvasses on the walls and blooming hanging baskets drape down from above. We sit outside and watch a local bowls match take place in the sunshine.

If I was Brave enough...

I’d like to do the things I regret not doing. Completing one more activity to check off my list rather than leaving it for next time. It might take a little more time and energy but at least I’d feel more productive. Instead, I curl up into a little ball and hide myself from the world, doing only what I feel is safe rather than risking something new. I'd take more risks. I'd cram in as much as I can to see what I can get away with. I'll avoid paying that train fare and see if anyone does come round to check my ticket. I'd stand up and say no more often, whether it's a customer insisting on me giving them a refund for a product that I know that they’ve misused, or saying no to completing a task that I shouldn't really be doing.  I’d say not to an event that someone asks me to attend. I'll get into fights more. That may sound a bit vicious, but when you get picked on you need to stand up for yourself and face the consequences no matter what they are, and never take the easy path to let injustice get the better of you.

A Wander Around Wolverhampton

It’s time for a wander around Wolverhampton. I’ve greed to meet my friend John at the beer festival which is usually held in the Civic Centre, but owing to a refurbishment it’s being held at an arts centre instead. On arrival to the city, I’m amazed at how much the bus station has transformed since my last visit. It’s gone from an open-air roundabout to a full-on commercial centre. My journey takes me across a well-placed pelican crossing over a dual carriageway followed by the Wanderer’s grounds and into the suburbs. I then follow a cycle lane through some back-to-back houses which brings me out at the back of the arts hall. This brings me out at the volunteer’s entrance, but there’s no sign to the customer’s entrance. Once I’m redirected, I find myself near the front of the queue to this colourful building. It’s not long before John arrives further down and I sacrifice my place to join him.

Disney+

You might think that you might be finished with a product after six months. But that time has just flown by, and as well as catching up with a series that I’ve very much enjoyed, I’ve also watched some old favourites (perhaps too often). There is simply too much to choose from. As well as having access to the Star Wars and Marvel worlds, there’s also occasional material fed through third parties. And Fox have worked their way in there as well, so The Simpsons and Family Guy also make an appearance. The result is too much choice, and with the lack of advertising you may be amazed at what you can get through. There may be a thing as too much telly. But as long as there’s a good source of data to stream then it’s all good and the trial-free price isn’t bad either. I wonder how I did without it. 

Profit Procurers

We made an impressive bit of profit from the shop. Not bad considering we’d only make a pound or two off each customer. The main thing that we have to work out is what we’d make the money from as we’d be billed for the items that aren’t returned to the warehouse. We’d keep a separate till for the beer tokens so that wouldn’t be an issue, and we’d try to update our inventory every time we sold an item but it’s hard to keep track of everything when it gets busy. This year we had surplus inventory anyway so we had to label up our own boxes so that it would be accountable to the warehouse and I even took photographic proof just in case there were any issues between the courier and the warehouse. Luckily, both the treasurer and the warehouse accepted the figures that I supplied. They didn’t query them and I had to chase them to acknowledge it to be certain that I could wash my hands of it.

Supermarket Parking Wars #dreamdiary 121

It’s a dark and stormy evening. I’ve borrowed a friend’s car to drive some other friends to the pub. Ironically he’s a pub landlord but we’re not planning to visit his pub. His car is a beautiful silvery Jaguar which has a touch of blue. One of my friends has asked me to pick him up from the supermarket. We’re in the queue to leave the car park when suddenly a trolley sails past and hits the car square on the bonnet. We get out but we can’t see where it came from. I quickly reverse the car into a vacant space and we use our phones to check the car but we can’t spot any scratches. Then just in front of us there’s a large bang. An old woman has driven right into the back of a red reliant robin which has caused it to rise up into the air and onto her bonnet. There’s a screech of tyres as the offending car, a light purple Volkswagen Beetle, roars away.

Product Range

I’m amazed by what we sell at the festival. For example, it’s the middle of summer and we’ve managed to sell three beanie hats. Maybe these people are starting their gift shopping early just like they get up early in the morning. Or maybe they’re off their head and they’ll buy anything for a bit of fun and festival spirit. Some of the old beer guides go alongside the current ones and occasionally people like to haggle but we do have a cost price and a recommended price that’s set by our distributors. Sometimes they set discounts if the customer’s a member and occasionally they’ll be some clearance bargains. Sometimes we’re able to sell festival staff shirts that people have donated or take orders for shirts if we run out and people are desperate to have them delivered. There used to be a greater range of merchandise like umbrellas that may come in handy but we don’t really want to jinx it!

Down Boy

He’s a scrawny small man with thin, round glasses and long hair that’s styled into a tuff. He enjoys the outdoor life and is always dressed for the weather. He previously stayed in a run-down house but now has a partner so that may not be the current case. He enjoys real things rather than products that are massed produced and will choose home-grown over convenience every time to help reduce his carbon footprint. He has some respect for people but he also has an ego and can often throw his toys out of the pram if he doesn’t get his way. I wonder if he was like that during childhood and if he always had the courage to do this. He’s always after knowledge to pass onto others, and loves acting mischievous in front of children; especially when he gets to put on a show; even if it involves dressing up as a giant apple and toppling over as he’s chased around the village green.    

Staffing the Shop

So what do I look for when recruiting shop volunteers? Ironically, it can be one of the easiest roles of the festival so long as you know what you’re selling; what you are doing and have some basic common knowledge math sense. Apart from that it’s quite easy and you can make fair progress on a book in quiet times, maybe even one that you’re selling so long as you don’t mind the odd interruption to answer a query. Just sit at the counter and everything you need is in easy reach. To encourage people to visit, we do exchange cash into beer tokens to encourage people to look at what we’re selling while they wait. Occasionally you may have to function as a point of knowledge as people approach for advice on various topics, but some might just want to stop and chat in passing. But as long as you know your stuff, you’ll be fine.

Black History Month

It’s that time of the month where we learn about oppression two centuries ago and how people today are still working to overcome it because of prejudice. It makes you think what would happen if we hadn’t advanced industrialisation through globalisation, and it might have made a real difference to how we operate our society today. There would be so much more skilled trade available as we wouldn’t rely on cheaper imports all the time. The only downside is that things would be a bit bland and there wouldn’t be enough choice, and a lot has changed to make that happen. But what’s really annoying is the focus for the rest of the year. What about industrial heritage, or cultural history? Where’s the focus on these subjects and why don’t they get attention? It’s fine to focus on a group that’s been neglected so much but there’s so many positives to history as well so that people can learn just how far they’ve advanced, and also what we’ve lost. 

When orders go Wrong

The books arrived from HQ alongside the festival equipment that we’d ordered. There was a bit of excitement as there were quite a few boxes to open and check off. Because some of the less popular titles wouldn’t sell so much, they sent them in a box mixed with others rather than sending whole complete boxes. But we still had way too much stock than what we’d ordered. At one point we had more books than beer. I was very much tempted to keep what we’d got and sneak in some extra sales for ourselves but the t-shirts that I’d ordered hadn’t arrived and these would also be chargeable to us. After taking an inventory, I discovered that the warehouse had picked our book order twice and they hadn’t had any records of sending out the t-shirts to us. I then had to declare to them what we had received so that they could adjust their stock accordingly.

 

Loki

This series felt a bit drab. I liked the interchanging font in the series logo portraying mischief, but other than that Loki doesn’t really get to be that mischievous which leaves the show to be a bit dark and dull. I was very disappointed with the futuristic time agency and I’d expect something better than a run-down library containing files from the seventies and computers that wouldn’t look out of place at a shuttle launch. It even stars Owen Wilson as a senior cowboy-styled detective. The whole series just felt dragged out with lots of awkward pauses. I was hoping for more moments where Loki could travel through time and wreak havoc with his powers while the time agency followed his wake. There were a few random chuckles such as the military-style hunters arriving at a renaissance fair in 1985 and an alligator claiming to be a Loki but the characters lacked the energy that we’ve seen in the other Marvel spin-offs. Hopefully the next season will be a bit faster.

Death of a Gentle Lady by M. C. Beaton

Death of a Gentle Lady by M.C. Beaton
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

It’s a bit difficult to like a protagonist when they decide to go rogue for their own interests rather than for the greater good. But it seems to be a done thing in the Highlands where everyone’s partial to a drop of hospitality and doesn’t want to face change themselves, but are happy to help others. Still, could it be that every murder is linked to the newest resident of Lochdubh? It seems to be that way which gives Macbeth an easy job of defending the long-term locals. All he’s got to do is get the evidence, and sometimes most of the time it’s achieved by foul means rather than fair. It’s lucky that he can trust his fellow residents to back him up and it’s good to see that modern-day technology has finally reached the Highlands. And you can always rely on Beaton’s regular cast of characters to provide a few laughs.

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Death of a Tweet

I originally wanted to check out a canal picture which I’m told was beautiful in the Autumn. It was odd that it wasn’t displayed in the e-mail. After trying to find the tweet in my feed in my app, I discovered that it was deleted, so I decided to check out the app that they were trying to sell instead. It turned out to be a collective of independent businesses selling their wares and offering discounts provided that you subscribed to the app. I looked at the bar ones which mainly offered discounts off the bill on certain days. I suppose it’s handy enough if you live in the area or frequent these premises often and could be a moneysaver, but for a casual visitor it’s not worth it unless you’re specifically heading to these venues and there’s a saving to be made. If there’s any events on, I’m sure the app’s Twitter feed will tell me. But I wonder why the tweet got dropped. Maybe a copyright infringement was involved. It’s a shame, I bet it was a nice gesture originally.

Stocking the Shop

Once the counter is in place, the next thing that I need is some stock to sell. We’ve got a few bits of memorabilia that people like to rummage through. We’ve got leftover glasses from old festivals that people like to collect, and shirts from previous years that people have donated as well. We also have a large box of old pump clips advertising beers from earlier festivals that people like to rummage through as well. Some of these are worth a bit of money, especially the metallic ones and I picked one up for peanuts at a previous beer festival. But we also ned to be contemporary to get younger customers to part with their cash so we order a selection of items from the CAMRA bookshop. We order a few of the latest titles, alongside t-shirts, keyrings and bottle openers. Finally, our biggest and cheapest seller is a humble pen. People like to tick off the beers in the programme that they’ve tried and always forget to bring one. We used to buy these branded but we got some of our own professionally printed to increase our revenue on them. 

 

Guard Dogs #Titannabell 9

As the party progressed late into the night, the revellers grew less and less. Some had chores to address the following day. But the squire’s guards, at least those that were off duty, took the time to keep the party going as long as they could; much to the jealously of those who still had to keep watch. Occasionally, they’d be able to swipe a bottle of mead or a jug of ale from a departed table that hadn’t been cleared yet.

‘This ale’s disgusting.’ said one guard to his friend, an arm hidden behind his back. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’d coughed their guts out before they left.’ He threw the contents into a shrub pot, then shrugged and dropped the jug there too.

‘Never mind that, who’s on door duty tonight? They’ve put the giantess in the breakfast room. Just imagine her sans clothes.’ They gazed up at the giantess’s chest, which had two large wine barrels of its own.  

Shirts for Sale

 And this is my little shop. It takes a while to set up and top get everything nice and neat ready for the festival opening. First, the counter has to be rested in its place. It’s a giant bulky counter that we bought off a department store that went into liquidation. People have talked about attaching wheels to it to make it easier to transport but they never have. It’s usually one of the first things that get loaded onto the trailer, then everything else is built up around it. I usually have to try and look busy when it’s time to lift it so I can try and get out of it. There’s a sheet of glass in place so that things can be put on show without too much fear of them wandering off, and there’s also a light inside. It’s even got drawers which we have to take out when lifting and put back in when it reaches its resting place.

"If you want something you've never had, you must be willing to do something you've never done."

 -Thomas Jefferson.

Obtaining things is a process, so this advice can be very specific. In a material world, to try something that you’ve never had before is to physically take it off the shelf or take an appropriate action to obtain it. Of course, if you want to win a game of chance and use the exact same strategy every time, it defies a new action as the result has come to you without effort. There’s also a process called ‘accumulation of wealth’, or savings in modern-day terms.  Most of the time when you want something, it’s all down to a very similar process. But when you can’t identify what the process is, you have to take the time to come up with another strategy. You need to compare the similarities and work through the differences. And this time you might succeed. It’s all about finding the method that works best for you.

The List

 I get given a weekly list of groceries to obtain for the house. We try and keep track of when we’re running low on things and stock up accordingly. On the evening before there’s usually a last-ditch attempt to check anything that we might have missed and we also look at what we’re up to in the forthcoming week and try to plan our meals accordingly, although a lot of the time it’s down to the dates of the produce that I buy. Then comes the great day of the shop itself. I cross-examine the list before I set off to try and eliminate any queries. I always try and get the longest dates possible to give us a greater flexibility of choice, but sometimes you’ve just got to go with what’s there. Sometimes there’s things off the list that I know we need, and sometimes it’s soon to make another purchase of a particular item. We usually work it out when we’re back at home and re-stock and freeze accordingly.

Victoria Beckham's fans slam her Instagram post of model's boobs as 'obscene'.

It’s a bit of an overreaction. It’s just one picture. Do we care how other people react? Will that force your opinion of how to react? We don’t even get to see the photo to make our own mind up. And what does this mean for Posh Spice? Does she only like women now? Maybe it’s a mistake. Maybe she meant to send it to a friend rather than the rest of the world. It’s the sort of thing that you’d expect to see in a trashy woman’s afternoon talk show or a TV movie where the original offended person turns into a serial killer to get revenge. It’s certainly something to talk about when you’re bored. And I did have to look up what a sheer shirt was. But do people really want to know this stuff? And I’m the fifth person down the chain to know about it. Why did it take so long?

Preparing for Lift-Off

Many people don’t think how things happen, but it’s a real test of logistics to run an event. Anything and everything can go wrong, from building the venue to setting up everything inside it and having access to everything you need to open the doors. Then you’ve got to hope that everything arrives; from the materials you’ve ordered weeks ago to the teams that put the equipment together to make it an event to remember. There’s quite a few people to trust and rely on to make things happen. In a way, it makes us look like a travelling circus as we’re one big family that knows each other. In the end we’ll all get along fine so long as everyone does their fair share of the work and we’re all kept happy, mainly through the people that we’ve volunteered to serve. It could be the weather, or the right people who bring the right atmosphere with them. But we need anyone and everyone to make the whole thing sustainable. 

Hotel of Hatred #dreamdiary 120

I’m staying at a hotel! I can’t quite predict how to get there but I know where to turn when I see the local landmarks. It’s a stone building hidden on a corner behind another street corner. The ground floor has a series of barber poles in its glass restaurant but I know it’s a restaurant. I go through a door at the rear and climb a spiral staircase in a stone tower. I walk down a corridor alongside a window and enter my room. It’s a bit stuffy and warm so I decide to open the window. A man in a vest with scruffy hair and moustache is sitting in a lower room at the opposite side of the courtyard scowls at me a if he wants to get into a fight. Suddenly the floor gives and I fall through the hole and manage to grab onto the windowsill of the floor below. I look through this window for help but no-one is looking. 

Space Beer

As it was the fiftieth year commemorating the first man on the moon, we decided to make a theme out of for this year’s beer festival. It was me that put the theme forward and it was a factoid that I’d overheard on TV. While this put forward all sorts of ideas for our logo and branding, there wasn’t much that we could do in terms of dressing up the site. I suppose that if we had more time and a bigger budget then we could have made papier-mâché planets to hang from the beams of the marquee. Dressing up was also difficult. A few people managed to sort out some feelers or an inflatable companion to take with them. One person even managed an astronaut costume. But for the most part some wore clothing commemorating their visit to the Kennedy Space Center or similar NASA attire. On the plus side, we did invite the local astronomy club to take up a stall to promote themselves and provide a telescope for stargazing. Maybe next year we can be more creative. 

My Earliest Memory

It must have been Halloween. I’d got out of bed late at night and must have headed to the bathroom. I was wearing some kind of two-piece pyjamas. They might have even consisted of a horrible two-piece brown and white design with a buttoned down shirt. As I left the bathroom, there was a series of loud rattles coming from downstairs. Our porch wasn’t enclosed in those days so the letterbox fed straight into the house. The metallic flap started rattling and a voice called out ‘Trick or treat’ followed by a series of spooky laughs. All I remember in response is running straight back to bed and jump under the covers. I don’t remember anyone coming to comfort me. I suppose this is always why I’ve been reluctant to get out of bed at night. It could have been some kids canvassing for treats. It could have been my own father doing the spooky voice. The whole thing could have been a dream. It’s concerning that it’ a memory out of fear and not out of love. Maybe my happy memories are few and far between. 

Plotting Penguins

‘Attention penguins. Yes, you lot! Listen! I have a plan! Look, I know I’m a bit young to be doing this sort of thing, but I can’t see that any of you have tried an escape plan before either. Look at me, don’t look at the others, look at me. You may be used to settling here and getting food thrown at you at regular intervals but I’d like to think that there’s a bigger world outside of these walls. And if you want to, you can still stay here and get fat and bored! Nobody says you have to come with me! But all we have to do is push those rocks together and we can jump out of this pit. I’ll even make sure that I can find a way for us all to get back inside if anyone changes their mind. And it’s not dangerous! All the humans will do is look at us, and we already know what that’s like as we can a few in to visit us every day! So, who’s in?’

 

Soothing Purple

Travel insurance is one of those things that you don’t really need but it’s good to have. If you have a stress-free, the company’s laughing as they’ve made some cash out of you. But if things go wrong, that small fee that you’ve paid upfront can be very valuable indeed. I like to think of it as help that I’ve paid for advance, but then it’s a case of figuring out whether they’re obliged to help you, whether it should be someone else’s responsibility, or whether it’s your fault for not having a policy to cover that eventuality. After digesting the usual terms and conditions we decided to just go for the cheapest option which was to cover medical conditions, and that we’d deal with anything else ourselves should the situation arise. Hopefully we’ll be able to put our faith into our fellow man and find someone who at least could give us some advice on what best to do.   

The Great Escape

I wonder how many animals escape from the park? A river runs through it and it won’t take much for birds to get out of there. Maybe they’re accustomed to calling in for the food which saves them from having to hunt. The penguins are fairly secure though. There’s no way out for them unless someone leaves the door of the enclosure unlocked. It makes for a boring life apart from when the fish is thrown in. Even then, they’d prefer to hunt their own food in their own time rather than adapt to a schedule. Give them a prop and they’ll make their own way out without question. Until then, they just smile and wave in the hope that escape will come to them. Still, you can’t take your eye off them as you never know when they might attempt that cliff or get together to get themselves over the wall. 

Agent Carter

It’s a shame that this show was cancelled before its time. It’s got an enjoyable fast pace with plenty of humour for its interactions between its characters and it’s set within an interesting time period. It’s also historically accurate with that time period’s attitude towards women, and the conflict between Carter’s activities and those of the SSR makes for a particularly interesting twist; although this does get harder to follow towards the end of the second season. I really enjoyed the musical ensemble towards the end of the second season and it would have been interesting to have seen more of these from different characters; although portraying Carter’s many love interests does put a bit of a damper on her otherwise righteous character, and these should have been spread out over a longer series, or at least put up against each other. I would have liked to have seen a bit of the SSR’s evolution into SHIELD and some interlinking stories such as Carter’s investigation into Reinhardt, her relationship with the Howling Commandos, or even a tie-in to Sousa’s death in the concluding season of Agents of Shield. Oh well, maybe Disney will see sense.   

Jurassic Woods

I was hoping to get a bit of excitement from the kids at this exhibit. Dinosaurs in the woods! They might even had got scared and ran away, but  think they were probably just a bit tired and decided to go on this walk to humour me. They’d probably be more impressed if they moved, though they did enjoy watching the real wildlife that we came across on the trail. We followed a sheltered trail which meandered through the woods, and at every clearing or say we’d bump into a giant plastic dinosaur. Occasionally there’d by a sign displaying facts, and sometimes there’d be a handle that you could turn to generate sound effects. There were also bird hides to give the impression that you were watching live animals! It was great to see the figures enacting a story rather than standing stationary for a photograph. And I did like the entrance. It gave a feel of entering Jurassic Park.

Who the F**k is Alice?

She’s not your stereotypical blonde. She thinks before she speaks but when she does she’s sure of it. She’s got a very smug attitude. There’s not much that she doesn’t know and she’s not afraid to ask questions to find things out. She’s got the public school accent as well. She gives the impression of a goth girl that’s grown up. She has a simple parting in her hair which allows her to have it down covering her face or put up into a ponytail as she sees fit. She’s naturally round without being slim or obese. She can be a right tomboy if she wants to blend in with anybody, and she’s fearless enough not to let anyone put themselves above her. She works when she has to but she makes sure that she’s the first to back out and the last to exert herself. At least I’m not living next door to her. 

Death of a Bore by M. C. Beaton

Death of a Bore by M.C. Beaton
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

If you’re looking for a book about life in the community, this is it! Macbeth certainly knows everyone in the Highlands whether they’re growing up or just passing through, and certainly isn’t afraid of preserving the ways from all that intrude into his territory. But he’s not all a doom and gloom man, even if he’s not one of action. He likes to observe rather than participate, but he always likes to seek out companionship, whether it’s a neighbour, animal, or a wee dram. And there’s always some crime that needs examining in every chapter, and even if it’s not worth arresting the culprit for, Beaton still makes an enjoyable dialogue of conflict out of it. And out of this come some very interesting characters that you can just picture going about their day-to-day lives in the village. It’s nice to see how this close-knit community comes together to help their local bobby; whether it’s helping him solve the crimes, cleaning his quarters, or even finding him a wife. It all makes for a very enjoyable read.

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A Tweet too Far

I’m all for promoting events but a bit of common sense is required as to when an event is public and when it’s private. Why would you publicise another organisation’s annual general meeting to people who aren’t eligible to attend? It’s going to be very awkward to try and get any business conducted without any enquiries otherwise. The last thing you want is a bunch of strangers turning up to a gathering of a few club friends asking questions to what would normally be self-explanatory, and having to explain every single activity. It would certainly ruin the flow of the evening, and both parties would certainly feel the awkwardness. I’m not sure that any gate crashers would want to show up anyway. It’s a shame that that the retweeters didn’t read properly what they were re-tweeting. They’d be better off focusing on their own events rather than those of other organisations. It’s a perfect example of how not to use social media.

Shoulder View

What’s the best way to carry a toddler? It usually depends on the size and the mood that they’re in. If they want speed, they prefer the piggyback but if they don’t hold on properly then they’ll end up wrapping their arms around your neck. If they’re curious, then they want to explore and be as high up on your shoulders as possible to see the world. In this case, they can sit on your shoulders with their legs dangling down your arms while you grab onto their knees. But you’ve got to be able to lift them up that high to get there in the first place, and a tiny bit higher to get them to come down. If you can find somewhere for them to stand to raise their height then it’s easy for them to climb on but you need them to be confident to climb off afterwards or be able to lift them up and over. Sometimes it’s a question of balance.

 

Inspire Me

It didn’t take long. I was hoping to be whisked off to a world of wonder. Maybe it was going to ask me some questions or play some improvisational music. Instead, I’m told that it can’t find that skill and I’ve got to find it on the app instead. It’s a good job my hands are free. After a few taps, I’m required to complete the set-up process by verifying my e-mail address. I’ve still got no idea what this skill will do or whether it’ll be worth it. Nothing comes to my e-mail address so I press the big launch button in the app. A smaller button below appears displaying my echo dot. It’s the only Amazon device that’s active at the moment. Finally, something happens. I get a narrative from J.K Rowling telling me about the benefits of failure. I’m then asked if I want to give them some money for providing this content. These skills seem to take a lot of effort to set up. Surely they should built solely by Amazon to guarantee their success?

Bird is the Word

These are Caribbean flamingos. You can tell because they’re a brighter shade of pink. Perhaps it’s because of the sun, or more likely that their ancestors grew up in the sun. Apparently colour is also important for mating. I suppose that the brighter you are, the hornier you are and it makes you stand out, but it isn’t great for camouflaging yourself in the wild. This must be a rare moment because they’re actually on two legs. Maybe the party’s just getting started and they’re waiting for the DJ to put the music on. Or maybe they’re on patrol marching through the pond looking for food. They’re also situated in front of the park’s café. I wonder what they taste like? Per haps a gamey sort of chicken with a jerk flavour. Shrimp is one of their favourite foods, so it may even be possible to have stuffed flamingo? I suppose you’d kill it before the filling was digested though.   

In Anticipation of Something Bigger #empress8

People were dashing about everywhere in a sense of panic. Zhong pulled one aside who looked at him with a vague sense of recognition.   

‘It’s you, it’s you, you’re’ finally here!’ he said. Then he turned and ran down a staircase. Moments later, the rumblings got more severe for a moment, then stopped completely. A number of other guards dashed out carrying large beams of timber, presumably to reinforce the building.

‘Where is the empress?’ he asked a passing guard.

‘Oh, she’s gone on vacation. She said you can use her old throne room while you wait.’

‘Her old throne room?’

‘Yes, it needs to be extended a bit. When you’re ready, just follow the cave and it will take you back to your homeland; though you may want to watch out for…oncoming traffic.’

‘Won’t it be a bit noisy with all the alterations?’

‘Well, yes. You’d probably be better off sheltering in the cave.’

Swans or Flamingos?

After lunch, we headed back out to see the rest of the park. There were some very well-attended gardens and lakes with some excellent views of some flamingos. At one point, we thought they were one-legged swans as a few of them were white, but we chalked it up to the flock being very young. It didn’t take long before we’d inspected all the cages, but we decided to stick around for the penguin feeding. We met the keeper of the day whose assistant threw out the first fish which instantly persuaded the penguins to take a dip into the water. My eldest niece was fascinated, but my youngest niece got a bit bored. It might have been because she was soaked through owing to not wearing any trousers. We drifted back to the flamingos, but I think she was more interested in being carried around on my shoulders. We spent the last part of our visit in the Jurassic reserve.

 

Stuck Around the Metro #dreamdiary 119

I’m late for work. I decide that if I forego breakfast, I can make it on time and maybe stop at the convenience store on the way and buy a sandwich to sneak into the stockroom later. I head off on my e-scooter and park it outside the shop opposite the metro line. The whole area is full of sanded concrete buildings in a pedestrianised area containing shops in what used to be a huge housing estate with a jumble of roads and criss-cross green spaces. The e-scooter is still running. I ponder the best way to get to work from here. Should I backtrack on myself and go down the old road? Or should I turn off the scooter and walk through the precinct to catch a glance at our company’s newer store? I look at my watch and discover that I should have been at work by now. I take out my phone and start looking at Google maps to plan the best route. 

Prancing around Penguins

We entered through the turnstile. For a half-term holiday it wasn’t crowded, but either the day-trippers have been and gone or the weather had put a lot of people off. The first thing we saw was the penguin enclosure. Nothing much was going on apart from they were out for a waddle.  There was a young one out refusing to take his eyes off the gate where the keeper would obviously enter to feed them, but other than that not much was happening. Further up, there was an observation bridge overlooking the pool. We walked around to look at various coloured birds in cages, then we decided to head into the café for lunch. From the outside it looked very nice with its tables and views, but as it was tipping it down we were huddled into a corner amongst the other sheltering families. I can’t remember what we had and there was a fair wait for service, but the girls did get an activity pack to play with while we waited.

What is the craziest office scandal that happened at your job?

 I took on a temporary early evening cleaning job with two fairly aged mothers. We’d meet in the reception of an office block and we’d each load up a trolley of supplies to cover three or four office areas. We’d do simple things like vacuuming, emptying the bins, cleaning the toilets and scrubbing down desks. The offices were mainly for social security workers so we wouldn’t expect anything to be too gross, but everything had to be super hygienic and we had to wear gloves and even sanitise the phones. I guess that if the office workers walked in the next day and couldn’t smell any sanitiser then we hadn’t been scrubbing hard enough. We’d spend maybe half an hour doing our own areas then we’d put the kettle on and have a brew while our supervisor checked that our work was satisfactory. One day I received a note saying dear Mrs. Cleaner with a list of areas for me to focus on that evening. I guess they hadn’t cottoned onto equal rights yet. Yeah, I don’t have much experience of working in an office.     

Stuck in the Village

There’s only so much you can do to entertain children in a confined space. So when we’d walked round the model village and spotted as many things as we could think of and posed to our heart’s content, it was a struggle to think what to do next. We’d already paid an admission fee for an attraction, and it wasn’t the best of weather to go for a walk around the village, though we did do the traditional walk across the ford. It was too early to justify getting back into the car to go home. In the end I forked out for a family ticket to go into Birdland. It wasn’t in our original plan but the kids said that they wanted to go there as soon as we arrived in the village. And being as it was their day out and they were being very good I decided to treat them. 

"A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on."

-John F. Kennedy.

It’s natural to want your legacy to live in in some form, whether it’s through your children or to commemorated for something that you did. It’s your calling card that you were here on earth. And even if the planet is left in ruins, it’s hoped that some form of your existence would still prevail; even if it’s a mission that you weren’t able to complete but someone else might strive to achieve your goal, even if they claim it as their own. It’s ironic that some of these ideas are being discussed even now as quotes, if only to preserve the thinking of the person that spoke them. But ideas are nothing if people don’t discover them and they may never be found or acted on if people don’t share their thinking. The key is how people preserve these important ideas so that one day their wishes may be fulfilled. 

A model of a model within a model...

To be honest, it looks like a heck of a mess. It’s hard to say whether the newer buildings represent new houses built in the area or if they’re part of a restoration project. Is it genuine Cotswold stone, or is it just a plastic mould waiting for material to be added to it? There’s not really much in the way of a guide or an information board to tell you what you’re looking at, so it’s pretty much up to the viewer to decide. The public buildings were more interesting since some of them had sections of their walls removed so that you could peer inside. It looks like they want to stick to the traditional village rather than showcase how the village has evolved though. It would be great if they had a hands-on model section. Sure, they’d get some duff ones but they might pick up some new ideas too.    

 

Secrets

Nobody really likes a secret. I suppose it's OK if it turns out to be a nice surprise, but the consequences of discovering information that is detrimental to your character can be upsetting. It's a right that you should have access to the same knowledge as everyone else, all and you can hope you is that you’ll discover it but it's not nice when you know that everyone is conspiring to keep things from you. Sometimes it's a game, but when it becomes part of your life it can really get hold of you. I don't have a shocking secret. I might have dirty habits that I don't want you to discover, but it's probably for the best if you do as it'll stop me from performing them owing to fear of embarrassment. I've kept certain truths or attempt to from parents to avoid getting into trouble, and I suspect a lot of people have done the same thing, particularly with the law as well. But some people are addicted to secrets. They thrive on gossip and action and wonder how long I can last before someone finds them out. Love, stop. It makes them particularly addicted to soap operas, usually because of who's sleeping with who.

Little Posers

There’s a fair bit to see for little people. They can wind their way through the tiny lanes and take note of what’s inside each building, particularly when they may struggle to get a decent view on their own looking at the real thing. Some exhibits might need an explanation of their purpose. The pub looked particularly run down, and if it was a derelict pub it would certainly be an accurate model. It’s definitely one of the buildings that requires some work. Some of the buildings even looked like they’d suffered from mould or fire damage. And of course, they’ve got to take a postcard picture to say that they’ve been there, even if they don’t remember being there later on in their lives, or the squabbles just because they each wanted a picture of themselves on their own. I didn’t. And I don’t quite understand the poses they took, although I’m pretty sure that they won’t remember either.   

Towelling Off

What can you say about a piece of metal that consists of two rods that slide in and out of a bracket? I don’t think it even came in a box or had instructions. We just received pieces of metal wrapped in plastic and some screws. Apparently it’s easy to install but it’s not a job that I’m allowed to attempt. It does look a bit delicate as it doesn’t extend that far, and I also think that the gap between the rods isn’t wide enough if you’ve got two thick towels. It’s also quite shiny but it will probably spend most of its life covered up by towels. As it’s new, it does feel quite sturdy and the bracket hides away well but I wonder if it would hold the weight of two wet towels. I guess only time will tell and that I won’t have to worry about rust.

Village People

We arrive at the model village and pass through the turnstile. It’s a cash only job and I wonder if a mobile signal is powerful enough around here to warrant card payments. We’re greeted by a view of sandstone buildings surrounding by a well-trimmed wall of hedgerows to mark the perimeter fence. Occasionally there’s the odd domed umbrella floating about like some kind of camp spaceship, and the odd child’s hood peeking out over the rooftops. The buildings are a bit worn down; evidently the model’s been here a while and it’s not looking its best; some buildings are desperately in need of a touch-up or it could be the rain reflecting the actual village. The best thing I loved about it was that there was a model village within the model village. I’m guessing they only built that once though. Next to this was a railway exhibition but I don’t think the girls would been interested enough to warrant the extra charge to visit this.

 

A real real Wimpy wimpy

What was once a wimpy skinny guy with freckles on the nose that loved to prance around in water has now become a loyal friend. The belly might have grown a bit to the point of wondering if he’s pregnant, but a controlled diet has toned that back down again to be as short as his fair hair. He’s never ready at any physical activity unless it’s a walk with a pint at the end which often involves a beer gear. There’s an aura about him that he always has to be in labelled uniform and doesn’t realise when it’s time to be formal. He’s also not a great listener as information washes over him after it’s been explained. He’s happy to be committed to labour but isn’t a great instigator when it comes to planning, often choosing to shelter at home rather than taking a leap out into adventure.

Bourton-on-the-Water Model Village

It’s a cold, wet, day and it’s our turn to entertain the kids. We promised them a day out so off we head into the Cotswolds to look at the model village. It seems that despite the weather, a lot of other people have got the same idea. The local tourist trap car park is full of coaches and we take a lovely tour of the next pay and display lot only to discover that that’s full as well. We take a drive around the village and park in a backstreet outside someone’s house. It’s not ideal as we’re a short walk away but at least it’s legal and we’re not blocking anyone’s way. The girls don’t mind the walk as they’ve been inside the car for an hour and are keen to stretch their legs. It’s a shame that it’s a very busy road with nothing much in the way of sights.

 

Marvel's Agents of Shield

What an amazing series. It’s an evolved version of Thunderbirds only on a massive scale. There’s stunts and action galore as well as high-tech gadgets. It’s great how all the characters are committed to come together as a team. There’s also plenty of dry wit and humorous moments. And the mole buried in the team against the backdrop of the films was amazing. It’s a shame that this wasn’t carried out for the rest of the series. I love how the team’s leadership is shifted around the whole series. I thought it was a shame that Bobbi and Hunter left the series and was delighted to see Lance return in series 5. I must admit that the final two series was a bit hard to follow in terms of enemies and all the alterations of the timeline. It seems that they just couldn’t let go of Coulson, and Simmons experienced major character changes. But it’s certainly a series that I’d want to watch again.

The Feast #Titannabell 8

The King and Queen were seated on a raised table on a stage alongside the hosts of the party. Titannabell was invited to sit on a raised bed of cushions below the stage, but she was that tall that her breasts still overreached the host’s table. Because of her size, the hosts thought it would be rude not to keep Titannabell waiting for each course and would always ensure that she was served first and got the best and biggest portion as a token of their hostelry and have her own waiting staff. It was great entertainment for the rest of the crowd as well who were keen to witness how much food this girl could put away and whether she would grant the ensemble a favour by letting loose one of her earth-shaking belches. Of course, such an act would deem to be unladylike but it certainly didn’t deprive her of any attention.

Forward the Foundation by Issac Asimov

Forward the Foundation by Isaac Asimov
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

It’s certainly a tale of democracy. As with Asimov’s other tales in the saga, most of the action takes place through dialogue rather than narration and every character seems to have the right to exercise their say as they individually turn detective to counter-question their fellow characters in order to achieve their goal. But there’s few moments of humour in this story. Sometimes I feel as if it’s a tale of how Hari got his groove back as he deals with depressive moments of old age and battles politicians with conspiracies and infiltration, all while battling self-doubt and paranoid mutinies. But the idea of an army of gardeners penetrating the heart of government is certainly a novel one. At times it’s interesting to see how the stage is set for scenarios that take place later in the saga. There are still some unanswered questions and I was hoping to learn of some of Seldon’s soothsaying abilities which never transpired and it’s more than likely that these are now simply a product of the Second Foundation. But it’s really a sad tale of demise as the protagonist observes everything deteriorating around him, and it’s more a novel of self-interest rather than offering any real insight or technological progress.

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Barrels and Bongs

So just what the heck is happening here? It looks like the barrel’s trying to get high as it dishes out the beer. It looks like a tiny bit of plastic that’s someone’s moulded to the top. Is this a quick repair job to keep the line intact? Is the beer being transferred from one barrel to the other to make some room? And what’s the stuff that’s coming up the tube? Is it a gas or a liquid? Maybe the beer’s breathing and the air’s being extracted from the barrel to make it last longer. It’s strange that the keystone is on the metal rim of the barrel and not the wood. This must make it a lot harder to fit unless this is a barrel that’s designed to be refilled. I can think of better things to do on a Saturday afternoon. Hopefully it’s not wasting too much beer.

Ambridge Mosaic at Southcrest Manor Beer Festival

 A festival isn’t’ just about the bands you see or the beers you drink or how much you spend or avoid spending. It’s about the people you meet. The bands might be from the top of the pops and you could spend every penny you have sampling every item but if you’re doing it all solo it all tends to be a bit commercialised. And even with your friends it could just like you’re meeting up in the usual local all over again. It’s all about meeting different people and seeing how they interact with the same stimuli. You might find that character that everyone talks about or the event might just move you enough to become that person. There’s a great atmosphere to get you going with live music for everyone, bales of hay to sit on and chill out, and you can go at your own pace and try whatever takes your fancy.

Nice Day for a Drab Wedding #dreamdiary 118

Me and a colleague from work have been invited to a wedding reception. There’s been a bit of a debate as to who will attend, but we are the company’s chosen representatives. We work a half day then throw a blazer over our uniforms and jump into a taxi. We arrive at the local social club. Inside, we walk through a large open room with a square bar in the middle to reach the function room at the back. The tables are laid out banquet-style in front of a stage and we’re invited to take our seats. Then Mrs. Doyle (or a lookalike) arrives to a glittering gold backdrop. She’s wearing a matching top hat and tails with white gloves and boots. She presents the new bride and groom’s family who are a bit shy to be brought up on stage. We then realise that we have to make our way back to work and organise a taxi, realising that we still need to retrieve our cars from our workplace. We also haven’t seen the bride and groom all day. 

Happy Birthday

Is it a time for celebration or is it a time of reflection? After all, it does mark your demise. But it's a day when all the attention is on you. There's a ritual to this as we turn light into darkness by blowing out candles on a cake after observing how many there are. But does it mark another year of survival? Is it an opportunity to compare your progress to your peers? Whatever it is, society believes that it should be marked in some way. It's as if it's commemorating successful intercourse between two people around nine months before this date. And now we gather and send gifts and share cake and send cards if we can't be there or in this day and age a photo message on social media is dispatched instead. It's a great indication of who your friends and allies are. But don't forget that it's just as important to take part in the celebration of theirs as well.

 

Pointless

It’s a bit difficult to play these games on your own, but at least they get the theme music right in these things. We get a warm welcome from the gameshow hosts then the assistant jumps in to announce today’s category. Mine was History and Politics. I suppose you get the option to run away if you don’t fancy it. There’s also no time limit, so you can take as long as you like to answer the question, which means that there’s nothing to stop you from googling your answers either. So if you can’t think of anything, you can go ahead and learn. If you’re right, Richard does give a few other answers but not as much detail as he would in the show. After three rounds the game is over, and I’m invited to come back tomorrow to play again or pay to upgrade to the tournament mode. I suppose it’s handy to build up your confidence if you’re planning to appear on the show, but otherwise it’s just a quick five minutes of entertainment.