Perks of a Pouch

This is a great blend of coffee with just the right amount of ingredients sealed in to make a perfect cup of joe. There’s a variety of interesting flavours, and some of them are hard to find at times. You’ve got to keep your eye on the prices and only buy them when you know you’re getting a good deal. There’s an art to making it too. You must get the temperature of the water just right before pouring it into the mug. As you can’t really program a kettle to raise the water to your desired temperature, I boil it then let it cool for a minute or two before pouring. But do they expect us to use a thermometer? As it’s dried milk, I add a bit of real milk to make it creamier which also helps to cool it down faster. And even though it’s sugar in it because of the syrup, I still add some more. The result is a real rush that keeps you perked for the rest of the day.

Glenelg Brochs

Our picnic spot for the day was to be a pair of Brochs. We had no idea what to expect other than two towers in the middle of a field and I’m amazed that the sat-nav managed to find it. We managed to squeeze into a passing point and climbed up the hill to the tower. It was quite impressive and as it was an unmanned site we could explore and climb over it to our heart’s content. We’d taken some impressive shots of the valley and we were just settling down to some food when two other people approached us. Of all the places to bump into my Birmingham friends, the odds of it happening in rural Scotland was pretty slim but it happened. We even worked out that there was a brewery across the road, though it looked like no-one was onsite. After checking out the second tower, I got a message to say they’d called into the local shop and found the beers on sale there alongside some excellent local produce. It would have been rude not to.

 

You think You're a Lady

There’s nothing special about this lady at first glance. She has a straight oval face with a pointy nose and blonde hair which is usually wrapped in a ponytail. She has an athletic build that widens to the hips. She keeps herself active and busy. She dresses sensibly according to the weather, either in jeans or light black trousers, or even shorts if the sun is out. Her top is accessorised by either a long-sleeved jumper, a polo shirt, or a bikini if it’s really hot. She never wears branded clothing. It’s as if she’s too posh for that. But little do you know that she claims to be part of the aristocracy. She has a title in her name which her husband also earned through matrimony. And they certainly act the part, choosing to commit themselves to certain events then find themselves omitting themselves from the proceedings when they’re needed.   

Eilean Donan Castle

It was slightly ironic that we headed back to the mainland to visit our first picturesque castle of the trip, but it was nearby and it was Monday and we could get there early. We parked at a beautiful spot opposite the loch, and even though there was a strong wind it was still a nice day. We got our tickets and we decided to begin our tour around the outskirts before heading inside. We tried to picture James Bond driving his car across the drawbridge and realised it must have been a very tight manoeuvre or a complicated camera trick involving half a car. There were some brilliant military exhibits inside the castle explaining its history and defences but there wasn’t a lot of access to the upper ramparts. We decided to retire to the coffee shop back at the visitor centre which was in a very smart barn to discuss our next destination. 

 

Ask Venom

This is little more than a movie promoter which gives credit to whichever actor does the voiceover for the character. A simple song request results in instant rebellion and stubbornness. If you persist then you might achieve it. My first attempt to try to access other features resulted in my device asking me if I wanted to load a different character. Apart from that, all it wants to do is eat and destroy me, albeit in a slightly questioning and friendly voice. Responses are short and they’re limited. You can’t ask it questions that you’d normally put to your device as it takes over and answers them for you. There are hints as to what you can ask Venom next after every response but I can’t see how this feature is useful at all unless you’re a diehard fan. Perhaps the promotion has ended and I’m too late to play with all of the features.

Local Knowledge

As I had the first foot through the door, it was up to me to find things out. I’d already spotted the Co-op opposite us but to get there I had to cross the bridge. I asked the others if I should bring in any rations for their late arrival and the only response was beer. I had a nice, long lie-in and watched some videos on my tablet until I heard voices coming from downstairs and realised that it would probably be rude if I ignored them any longer. So after greetings and breakfast, we decided to spend the day exploring the local village to allow us all time to recover from our journey and to plan the rest of the week. We checked out the harbour and the shop, ventured over to look at the castle and took note of what days the local takeaways operated. Then we began to plan out the rest of the week. 

Terry Prachett's The Abominable Snowbaby

This animation was a bit far-fetched and too difficult to believe. It was aimed at children with a short attention span to get them to sit still for a few minutes while giving them the impression that they were allowed to stay up for a bit longer. It was a traditional hand-drawn cartoon which could have done with more colour and relied on traditional Christmases consisting of loads of snow which we haven’t seen in a long while, and portrayed a strange idea that single men lived where they worked, which was in a town that had snarling wolves or neighbours. The odd thing that there wasn’t a Christmas cake in sight, although the conclusion puts a mild focus on ornaments when Granny discovers her reward. Granny certainly has guts to take on the responsibility of a new pet, though there wasn’t much of a conclusion which could have been predicted from the beginning. 

Cottaging

It was pleasant. We had all the modern amenities but the décor was a bit old, especially in the lounge. There was a large TV in a comfortable lounge with sofas, although it wasn’t a big room and they were laid out in a linear style which wasn’t ideal for conversation. A small bookcase contained board games, magazines, and a few choice films. This led to a large conservatory which hosted a huge dining table and a hatch to pass your plates across, if you wanted anything else you either had to step outside or walk back through the lounge. The garden itself had a picnic bench, a washing line, and a lawn that was slightly overgrown. There were hills directly behind it but these were obstructed by other houses. The fencing was also quite low, and perhaps it was designed that way so that neighbours could keep an eye on us. Nevertheless, it was comfortable, functional and was a good base for exploring the island.

Exiled from the Club #dreamdiary 126

I’m at the local social club. I’ve always been a recognised face but I haven’t paid subs for a long while and I’ve decided that now is the time to cough up. I’ve been given a refresher tour of the club’s facilities. As well as the member’s lounge and the stage room, there’s been some new facilities upstairs. I’m taken into a dancing studio where a class is finishing and another one is preparing to start. I ask to see the gym which is through the next corridor, and as we walk some of the ladies pass us either side, some very eager to strip off to hit the showers. As I look into the gym, I’m told that I can’t go in as bingo is at play at the moment. I look in and see a huge wood-panelled room with chandeliers and portraits in golden frames. I return to the bar and am happy to cough up, but the barmaid wants to find the club manager to determine whether I need to pay the lapsed years too and how much my total should be. While I wait, I drift over into the function room where my mates are being entertained at a party. There’s bottles of craft beer and shots laid out on trays as welcome presents. I spot my friends who tell me that I can’t join them as it’s a private function. I decide to leave and a small grey car follow me out of the driveway. I step aside to let it pass, only for it to park at the top of the road.

A Leak in Kyleakin

It is absolutely hammering it down as I make my approach to our cottage. Ben is coming up tonight but that’s from Plymouth so he won’t be arriving until the early hours. And Maz is stuck on an island waiting for the weather to clear before she can depart on her ferry. This means that I’ll be the first through the door, which means that I’ll the first choice of bedrooms.  As I pass a hotel I see a sign advertising 150. I’ve got no idea whether it’s advertising the petrol price or a hotel room rate but I hope that it’s the latter. When I arrive, I have a combination to a box by the door which contains the key. It takes me an age to get the combination right to open the box and let me inside. But once I’m in, I opt for the double room with a commanding view of the opposite Loch.

 

Seeking out the View

There’s some magnificent views about of the city lately. We’re teased on social media by colourful shots of buildings both by day and by night. The photos really want to make you get out there and find them. But these views don’t exist for the human eye no matter how close you get to these buildings. The only way that they’re accessible is by drone. It’s a new perspective that you just can’t see unless you can levitate or pilot a vehicle that flies. If you’re really lucky you might gain access to an adjacent building and be able to climb up for a view by sticking your head out the window or walk onto the roof or balcony. Otherwise, you’re doomed to wander round the building’s grounds in the hope that you’re not followed by security guards trying to thwart your mission. And if you still can’t spot the viewpoint then the chances are that it’s been photoshopped.

The Naked Author: A Guide to Self-publishing by Alison Baverstock

The Naked Author by Alison Baverstock
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

There’s no doubt that there’s many decisions to be made when it comes to publishing. There’s a great deal of agencies to consider and Baverstock’s manner can be very off-putting; almost to the point that she’s trying to pitch a business solution to you. What annoys me most about this book is that a publication that is so focused on proofreading does contain a great many grammatical errors, and I’m not talking exercises here. It really does miscredit the guide. And in mentioning exercises, it offers extraordinarily little tasks that you can try yourself other than preparation for the real thing. The guide mentions a couple of websites that you can approach and points to other publications that may be more practical but other than that it’s a book of the obvious which becomes little more than an overinflated checklist that is very repetitive. Nevertheless, it’s good to cover everything to ensure that you’re not missing anything out.

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Home Comforts #titannabell11

Titannabell began her evening ritual of preparing herself for bed. At home she was accustomed to her comforts, but being the Princess she was subject to travel and staying in a variety of makeshift accommodations to honour her. Some of the efforts were very nice but sometimes they forgot the trivial things which made her feel like a person rather than an exhibit. In this instance, because she was in the breakfast room there were plenty of tables available to lay out her clothes but there was nowhere for her to wash her silky hair in the morning. Perhaps she could stroll down to the nearest lake in the morning, although she would have to dress to do that. She also missed the squish of her mattress, and although there were hundreds of blankets at her disposal it just wasn’t the same. Perhaps she could find something to compensate for that. 

Cairngorn Sheepshaggers Gold at the Winking Owl, Aviemore

I didn’t know what to expect of this pub. From the outside it has a homely feel, but when you get inside it feels as if you’re in a rather smart converted barn. The function room is downstairs, but I was shown to a very cosy table in the restaurant which had a view of a children’s play are that possible belonged to the hotel next door. The weather was terrible so there wasn’t really much to see anyway. The beer range was impressive and it was a shame that I had to restrict myself to one. I tried to recall which beer I hadn’t tried before and I got lucky. The burger that I tried was huge, though I did go a bit mad and added cheese, haggis and bacon. The chips were also crispy and had a nice flavour. I had to spend some time digesting before I was ready to leave the table. 

My boss just texted me implying that I will be fired if I go on vacation for four days, even though I gave two months' advance notice. My family already purchased the tickets and everything. Is there anything I can do?

There’s a difference between giving two months’ notice for a planned absence and getting permission. There needs to be enough cover in place, and if other employees have already booked leave for that week then there may not be enough people to cover your shift too. If your boss accepted your leave proposal at the time then you have a case for unfair dismissal regardless of whether your boss wanted to change it, and they should have taken time to consider the request before granting you leave. But if the ball swings the other way and your boss didn’t agree to the absence, then it might be an excuse for them to get rid of you. Check your employment contract to see what the procedure is. It really is down to which party defected from the agreement, and if you can find fault with your employer then maybe you should consider working for a better one (after you’ve sued them for damages of course).

Help, I Need Somebody

There wasn’t much that I could do. A couple of passing cyclists stopped to see if they could help and one even had a tool to try and crimp the links back together but that didn’t work. I tried to ring the office to see if they could send someone out but no-one picked up the phone. So all I could was to march back. I could make timely progress on the downward parts but when it came to uphill or flat ground all I could do was push. When I got back to the hire shop, all I got was an apologetic offer to fix me up with another bike, but I decided to push on in the car. I drove down to the loch for a photo opportunity, then decided to risk parking in the supermarket so that I could take in a spot of lunch before the last stretch to the island. 

"There's nothing more satisfying than seeing a happy and smiling child. I always help in any way I can, even if it's just signing an autograph. A child's smile is worth more than all the money in the world."

 -Lionel Messi.

It’s great when kids are happy. They’re easy to upset, and when they’re not you know that you’re doing something right. They’re too young to play the strategy card or fake emotions. It’s good, honest happiness, and no-one has to worry about them which is less stress for everyone. If they do get upset, everyone wants to help them out, even if it’s just for a bit of piece and quiet. However, I doubt that a scrap of paper with someone’s signature on it is going to help them much. They’d probably appreciate it more on a cheque so that they can purchase what they want, although they’d struggle to understand what this gesture would mean and there’d still be a considerable wait for their wanted attentions to arrive. But it’s about trying to find them happiness there and then, or at least until it’s time to depart from them and it becomes someone else’s problem.

Out of Pedal Power

My journey took me across the river Feshie where I stopped to take a picture of this beautiful river lined with trees. I carried on through an assortment of graded hills which propelled me both up and down until I joined a main road with a cycle path into Aviemore. I arrived quicker than Google anticipated and discovered that there wasn’t much that I could do on my own without locking my bike up. I looked on the map and thought about checking out Loch Morlich but the road didn’t feel very cycle friendly so I didn’t want to risk it. Instead, I decided to head back early. As I was approaching the last mile, a horrible creaking sound occurred and I lost all power in my pedals. I pulled over and found that my chain had disappeared; indeed it was behind me on the hill. I attempted to clip it together but it was too dented for me to form a loop. 

My Hardest Sacrifice

It’s choice. There’s just too much out there. I need to plan and I need to be honest with myself and decide. Who do I spend my time with? Who should I be dedicated to? When should I spend time on myself? The way that it’s going, I end up like a headless chicken as I’m trying to get around everywhere at once. But the problem is that physically, I’m not. Instead of facing up to my tasks, I sit there indecisively trying to decide on what I should focus on first. Too much time is spent thinking and not enough is spent doing. Sometimes the enormity of the tasks puts me off from starting any of them until it’s too late and I attempt the closest one and do it half-arsed so there’s still time to focus on the other activities. I like giving up my time to spend it with others as I feel that’s sociable but there’s seldom any compromise in return. I need to stand up for myself more and be honest with myself and if that means that I have to let others down then so be it. This path isn’t working so I need to find my own. I shouldn’t have to give up the things that I want to do, but I need to find the time to complete them.

On yer Bike

I fancied an activity before setting off on my long drive to the island. I also wanted to check out a pub that was a brewery tap, and as I was in a national park what better idea was there than to check it out on a bike? There was a bike place in town, but it was also available at the lodge which was more convenient as I wouldn’t have to pay for parking. So after having a chat at reception, she called down a member of the outdoor team to get me kitted out. I say kitted out, but I only received a bike and a helmet. When I enquired about a bike lock I was told that there wasn’t one available. I set off with my phone for guidance; luckily the lodge was on a national cycle route so I decided to follow the lane into the town, which would take about half an hour.

 

The Full Monty

Breakfast in a can! The idea sounds great, just heat it all up and it’s all ready to enjoy in a matter of minutes, with just an empty can and the minimal of clearing up to do afterwards. Its appearance isn’t the best though. Everything’s processed and full of tomato sauce, and there’s a lot of food for a portion which just congeals as you spoon it out into a cooking vessel. I always cook mine with some toast, but even that’s cooked from frozen. During the stir I add some brown sauce to give it a bit of flavour. It might not be a meal to have on the go though, and you may need time for it to leave your system before considering a physical activity. I’ve never actually had one cooked on the stove, even when I go camping. Perhaps it’s something I should try next time. It might alter the taste considerably.

A Bit of Bru

I’d managed to circumnavigate Glasgow but I was hitting heavy traffic. I had considered calling in at Stirling to re-visit the castle, but there was a major golf tournament enroute and traffic measures were in place. It was getting close to late afternoon and I found myself wondering whether I’d make it to my accommodation to have an evening meal. As I needed fuel, I made an executive express to have an early meal at Milano Express. I wasn’t sure whether this was a chain but decided to give it a go and ordered the spaghetti meatballs with a side of deep-fried mushrooms in a garlic dip. Then there was the question of what to drink. As Scotland is known for its stricter drink driving laws and faced with the fact that there wasn’t any ale to sup, I decided to play it safe with an Iron Bru. It only seemed right that my first Scottish meal should have something deep fried with a local drink to accompany it. And it was all surprisingly good.     

The Larkins

It took me ages to work out what everyone was talking about before I realised that they were referring to The Darling Buds of May. I vaguely recall the original series where a farmer and his family would be featured and that it billed a cast in their early career that have since gone on to achieve great things. I’ve got no idea how close this new series resembles the original plot or whether there’s new antics involved, but Ma and Mariette are spitting images of the original cast. Much mischief is made by this somewhat carefree large family; though they do express their concern about the bigger issues and always finds a method to preserve what’s under threat through their love of life to others. The villagers face threats similar to any village of today with a reduction of services and overdevelopment, but they rise to the challenge in a comical manner. I do think that the antics of the children are a bit unrealistic, though I love a corrupt vicar. Roll on the Christmas Special!

The Big Trip up North

It’s time to head back to one of the most beautiful places in the land; Scotland. On this journey I was supposed to be travelling up with a friend and meeting up with the others at a cottage but my friend had to cancel at the last minute, leaving me to travel up solo. I set out at a steady pace and stopped off at a service station in Lancashire for coffee, realising that the seat I’d chosen had a screen next to it where an autistic child was having an incident and was refusing to wear any clothes. Once Id figured out what was going on, I retreated to the other side of the restaurant. Up in Scotland I was treated to some beautiful scenery and I quite liked the sound of a castle that was signposted near Lockerbie. However, when I pulled off the motorway and googled the name of the castle for more information, I discovered that it was seventeen miles away in the opposite direction. Maybe a destination for another time.     

A Medical Mess #dreamdiary 125

We’ve been staying at a holiday home for the week. It’s a big place and we each have our own room, including the owners who have been cooking us our breakfast each morning, albeit with some sort of unwelcoming resentment. It’s the last day. Some of us have had to escape early, leaving the rest of us to tidy up the shared areas that we’ve been using. We’ve told the host that we’ve finished packing and tidying and we’re ready to go, and he asks if we’ve emptied the bins in our rooms. So we depart for another round trip around the whole establishment to empty the bins. As I approach the last room, I take the time to make sure that my friend’s collected everything. I open the bathroom cabinet and discover an alarming stash of medication. It’s all off-the-shelf stuff but I’ve got no idea whether it belongs to the holiday home or to my friend. 

Hanging out with this Party Animal

I love this girl. She may be old and worn out from having to have multiple operations, but she’s got a playful spirit and she’s always encouraging people to go for it. She encourages a bit of madness in everyone, even if it means dressing up as Batgirl at a local Comic-Con. At one point she was looking after a child which wasn’t her own; I’m still unsure to this day whether she was a foster mother but I understand that the child’s now been returned although they still keep in touch and have the odd outing together. She’s had a lovely dog which unfortunately passed away but that didn’t stop her from getting another one a few months later. Right now, I’m worried for her as her Mum’s gone into hospital. The only thing that I can think of doing to keep her going is trying to distract her from things outside of the workplace.  

 

Yorkshire Lass

If you’re looking for a definition of a free spirit, this girl has it all. She’s short and slim and a natural dirty blonde, with cute freckles on her nose and an oval face. She prefers the outdoor life to being an inside glamour girl, and has the energy to get where she wants to be. You’re more likely to find her wearing wellingtons and a thick jumper rather than a dress. From an early age, she’s had an interest in falconry, and for a while she pursued horticultural interests until she couldn’t spare the time to maintain her allotment. She’s competitive and likes to keep up with the boys, especially when she has three brothers. She also knows how to work people and when she can take advantage of them, whether it’s people at home or people that she works with. She’s also not prepared to answer back to people who have been let down by her. 

What Made the Crocodile Cry? by Susie Dent

What Made the Crocodile Cry?: 101 Questions about the English Language by Susie Dent
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

It’s an interesting guide to the history of words and their phrases, but sometimes the entries digress into other similar phrases rather than the headline one which grabs your attention. In some respects, it’s an entire book of Countdown’s Dictionary Corner. There’s a fair amount of vulgar words but few of them overall are used in everyday slang. It’s almost as if it’s a book for someone who fancies a new catchphrase. Inside, there’s also photographs rather than illustrations which adds a more serious edge to the book rather than the fun image on the cover. A foreword by Jo Brand was quite surprising and I was even more surprised to learn that she’s bezzy mates with the author. However, the book does reveal some very fascinating histories and mysteries about phrases present and mostly past. Some are quite predictive if you know your history; others do tell a good story. And that’s really all we’re after with this book.

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