Wednesday 31 March 2021

The Guernsey Literary Potato Peel Pie Society

This title sounds quite a mouthful, but the minute you learn that it’s set in WW2, you start to think of resistance plotting to throw away the invaders. Instead, you’ve got a romance story to follow where the protagonist is more of a detective than a lovebird as you attempt to work out what happened and why everyone wants it kept a secret. The only mystery that isn’t solved is how Juliet’s book came to be in Guernsey in the first place. I also learnt that those who choose their obligations lead much more interesting lives. A potato peel pie sounds very dry; although probably goes with the little humour illustrated here other than the opening scene. I just hope that we’re allowed to add things to it now that rationing is over. But the scenes that are filmed are just beautiful and it does take you back to a time where life was simpler.  

Tuesday 30 March 2021

Foundation & Earth by Isaac Asimov

Foundation and Earth (Foundation #5)Foundation and Earth by Isaac Asimov
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

In this book we observe Trevize’s journey of enlightenment as he attempts to seek out the reason for his decision which he hopes to find on Earth while the whole concept of Seldon’s plan is abandoned. But first, he must find the missing planet. He’s accompanied by a new character who just happens to have strange powers. It’s quite weird that Trevize and Pelorat accept the concept of these powers even though they’ve only spoken to Bliss and Dom and don’t seem to take the opportunity to explore the rest of the planet. This is a theme that seems to echo their other planetary visits, though they later have good reasons for their latter visits. Of course, Trevize wants to ensure that’s he’s following his own chain of thought and that he hasn’t been influenced by another factor. But because of the deception that occurred in the previous books, how can we simply trust these characters? This is probably why Trevize insists on ignoring the legends that everyone is telling him and decides to check it out for himself. There’s also some long philosophical debates which I thought were a bit unnecessary for the plot and were more for the academic reader. Bliss does create some comic moments, although I found Fallom annoying and at most times Pelorat was the voice of reason. I love the idea of a whole planet orgy! And does Gaia grow if Bliss eats but doesn’t excrete? There’s also a bit of naivety as they head off to explore the Spacer worlds. What are the chances that they land near a sign with the name of the planet on it? Where in our world is there a sign that says welcome to planet Earth?! It’s not like it’s embedded into the atmosphere. Hopefully in the next book we’ll find out who is really in charge of the universe and that it’s not down to these guys. Then we’ll know who to complain to.

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Monday 29 March 2021

Sky View

All people want when they look out of a window is to know what’s going on out there. They either want distraction or to discover what is distracting them. They want a decent view. And though you know you might not be treated to breath-taking scenes every time you peer through a window, you know that if you can see the sky, you’re in a good position to see what’s going on. If not, you’ll have to move, even if it means just stepping through the door. People are changing the view all the time. They build and demolish structures on the landscape. They’re making tracks in the air through the use of jet engines. They’re using engines to create smog to reduce our visibility. They’ve even influencing the clouds by engineering the path that the wind takes by building structures in its way. It’s just a matter of time before that barrier between earth and space disappears completely.

Sunday 28 March 2021

Tea at the Chateau

We had a pleasant trip down the motorway and very soon we were pulling into the grounds of the Chateau Impney. There were rolling hills on either side of the lane and our coach decided to give us a glamorous tour of the grounds before depositing us outside the back of the kitchens. Once we worked where the main entrance was, we climbed a glamourous carpeted staircase to a long bar where diners were being served their lunch. Then we walked past a sign welcoming award winners and a small squared chandeliered room and into a grand function room with pillars and high ceilings. We piled to the back of the room to sit round a circular table where we’d hopefully be the less noticeable guests. There was a bit of a lull as we waited for other guests to arrive from other stores but there weren’t in great a number as us. 

 

Saturday 27 March 2021

Clockwork Man

This is a man who likes things to run like clockwork. He’s happy to hang about for a few minutes if things are running behind, but he can’t wait forever. He’s got places to be and things to organise. He likes to be kept busy and he’s not used to relaxing. He’s a skinny man who’s neither tall or short or has any bulges in the right places, except perhaps for the mind where he’s a disciplinarian. An authoritative position certainly suits him, and he’s always dressed formally in a suit to illustrate the point. Long white hair falls and curls around his shoulders which suggests that he was a rocker in his former days but is paying the price for it now. But there is a friendly demeanour for those who treat him that way and respects the rules that are laid down. His smile is an honest one.   

Friday 26 March 2021

Team of the Year

We’ve won an award! We’re not quite sure how or why, but we’ve been voted as the best team in the area? Is it down to performance? Is it down to reputation? Is it down to a vote or the combination of the three? Who knows? All we know is we’re being treated to an afternoon out on full pay and the company’s footing the bill. They’ve even drafted in people from other stores to cover us while we’re away. As they arrive, I head to the bogs to ditch my work clothes and suit up. My colleagues have done likewise as they also know how posh the venue is. The only people to let the side down are the male management team who’ve just donned a shirt and tie and are furious with us as we’ve outdone. As we board the bus to leave, we warned our stand-in team that there may be rats about. We weren’t joking.


Thursday 25 March 2021

Artic Love

 Alexa’s latest interactive story involves a penguin who’s looking for love in time for the Artic ball. There’s pesky preparations, three creative locations to explore and even time travel. But alas, I could not find my true soulmate. I didn’t like the sound of the artic fox; the narwhale just broke up the party and the sea slug just wasn’t my cup of tea. I played it a few times to try and find true penguin companionship, but the best I could do was to waltz with a walrus. Maybe Alexa’s subtly breaking down racial barriers as we look for love. There’s some highly creative ideas about what artic wildlife get up to, but after a while it does get a bit samey when you’re listening to the same voice most of the time and some sound effects would make it a bit more immersing. At the end of the day, you’re choosing a slightly pre-written script to follow, but it does entertain you for a fair half-hour.

To play, just say alexa open the artic love interactive story.

Wednesday 24 March 2021

Scam Man

As part of the job, we’re always looking out for those that are trying to scam us. Often we’re the first and last point of defence when it comes to making sure that the customer’s currency or exchange is genuine. I’m not on a till very often and I don’t like letting people down. It’s also not coming out of my pocket. I suppose if it was repetitive and it was deemed that I was purposeful or acting through carelessness then I’d be out of a job. But of course, it’s not always the customer’s fault. Sometimes they’ll be given items which they genuinely believe to be correct but have entered our supply chain. And often the scammers know the checks that we do too. Sometimes all it takes is a label that can be peeled off one item and stuck onto another. Nevertheless, we must protect our revenue. And it’s a shame. But that’s business for you.


 

Tuesday 23 March 2021

Egypt Archaeologists discover Ancient Beer Factory

It’s otherwise known as a brewery. Previous knowledge of Egyptian brewers was that someone in the neighbourhood would be good at it and brew it round the back of someone’s house. It would be used as causal refreshment and the good stuff would be held back until the slave drivers had knocked off for the evening. Of course, some were better at it than others which is where trade would come in handy. If a brewer needed a camel or a sacrificial goat then he could trade his beer with a farmer to obtain it. These new reports seem to suggest that the brewery was owned by the kings. But the idea of a beer factory is something along the lines of a single company acting in defiance of Pharaoh. And a pyramid would be a great place to hide one. I wonder if they had taxes and had to pay duty?

Monday 22 March 2021

The Forbidden Library

After touring the crypt where all the interesting artefacts were displayed, we headed to the library on the upper levels. The tomes enclosed within this rickety old room were hundreds of years old, and some were even attached to chains as the church had deemed them unfit for human eyes. We had a lovely chat with the on-site librarian then popped downstairs to observe a lunar clock with the sun and moon and displayed figures as it tolled. That must be very distracting during services. Then we decided to check out the Bishop’s Palace itself. The main attraction here for us was the background scene for Hot Fuzz’s Secret Neighbourhood Watch Alliance, but there were plenty of interesting features to entertain us. As well as more swans, the outside of the house had a beautiful garden including a second inner half-moat and a waterfall. Inside the house was nothing particularly spectacular but we enjoyed posing with the various portraits and suits of armour on display. Then after some interesting stair wells, it was back to the movie tour.

Sunday 21 March 2021

A bit Ratty dreamdiary #105

There’s rats lose on the golf course. They’re darting about everywhere but no-one seems to worry as there’s a distinct lack of golf balls. No-one seems to mind the rats getting hurt and with every shot there’s no bounces allowed. An iPad is used to record where your rat lands then you follow the GPS to the spot. Then you set up a second tee while you catch another rat (unless you have a personal preference for the same one or you’ve bought your own supply). After we finish our game, we stand opposite the entrance to await our lift home. A huge statue of an angel catches our eye. There’s a giant stone hammer behind it. I spot a notice pinned to the front of the angel. It informs us that the statue has been sold to George Angelo of London. We debate whether this was purchased by a private individual or a firm who will relocate the statue. In any case, its removal is to make way for a new leisure centre.

Saturday 20 March 2021

Bishop Buddies

It was now time for a bit of architectural sightseeing. We walked past the entrance to Vicar’s Close which seemed to be a private community rather than a historical street. We circumnavigated the outer walls of the Bishop’s Palace and spotted a few swans before heading inside the cathedral. This building had some very interesting sights that wouldn’t be out of place in a Harry Potter movie. It seemed to be a huge network of buildings jumbled together including arch corridors and wide stone staircases. The detail on the figures carved into the outer steeple were amazing, while the arches above the nave were literally two eyes and a giant mouth gaping at you. I was also confused by the cope chest which is a particularly large and unnecessary way to store one’s cape. One staircase seemed to lead to nowhere but a large domed room with a giant pillar in the middle which would have been ideal for a large group of people to converse at once. 


Friday 19 March 2021

A Red Wedding #devilsdaughter 16

Lucinda walked down the aisle. She had no idea who all these people were or where they came from. Four hours ago she’d been sitting in the back of the limo sipping champagne ignoring the chattering around her. They’d been to not the most glamourous places in town, but she knew that she was getting slightly peckish. At one point she glanced out the window to see that they were outside a curtain factory. She wasn’t entirely sure if that was what she was now wearing, but the velvet felt so luxurious. It came with a tiny little Filipino woman to help wrap it around her who was now digesting in her belly. It did make the dress a little shorter on the rear end but she preferred that. And now she was in a fake chapel walking down the aisle to her betrothed. All eyes were on her as she passed, which was just what she wanted.   

Thursday 18 March 2021

Well, Well, Wells

We headed back to our hostel and snuck in a few beers to drink once the reception had closed for the evening. We supped these while watching a film, then managed a TV episode before turning in. The next day, we came up with the novel idea of catching the bus into Wells rather than driving so that we could do a pub crawl if we got bored. It didn’t take long to figure out where the stop was, although we were on the verge of giving up and getting the car out after all. The journey was quite pleasant as we had a superb view of the Mendip Hills. We also saw a cider shed with a fantastic garden which could be a possibility of a stop on the trip back. Today’s first landmark turned out to be the loading bay of a closed-down supermarket which was perfect for a photo opportunity. It was previously a clothes shop but before that it was the stomping grounds of Simon Skinner, a local entrepreneur.


Wednesday 17 March 2021

My daughter does not want to have children which makes me very disappointed in her. What can I do?

You can’t force people to do what you want. But you don’t need to disown your daughter either. Give her time and she may change her mind. Perhaps she can’t and she doesn’t want to tell you the reasons just yet. You just need to respect and understand why. Abandoning and shaming her does seem a bit cruel. But there are other things that you can do. Perhaps you could interest her to be involved in a relationship where children are present, or develop one of your own. Could you in turn produce another child? Or is there somewhere in the community that you can get involved with to assist with childcare? Perhaps babysitting or tutoring could be the answer, or even volunteering at a local school or creche? It might be the end of the road for your gene pool but there’s still options that you can take to help care for children.

Tuesday 16 March 2021

Jacking Around the Quarter Jack

 As we’d never been to Wells before, we hadn’t really worked out the best place to park. We quickly settled on an out-of-town supermarket and hoped that the car would still be there when we got back. It seems that we were here to visit famous sites from the 2006 action film Hot Fuzz. We started at the town’s Little Theatre where the premiere was held, then walked past The Globe to St. Cuthbert’s Church where local journalist Tim Messenger was murdered. After that we started to feel peckish and discovered that we weren’t far from the town’s Wetherspoon;  The Quarter Jack. This pub didn’t feel like much from the outside but was quite modern within. As the sun was shining we hit the beer garden which was still full of dinner rush plates, but we found a vacant pod built out of a concrete construction pipe. I opted for the pizza which wasn’t bad but could have been a bit more filling. At least the beer was crisp and refreshing.


Monday 15 March 2021

Dark Waters

This was a very long and drawn-out film. I know how the actors must have felt during its production. Its contrasts between city and rural life can sometimes be quite rude, and perhaps some character development should have taken place within the villagers. We gain a sense that their anger was portrayed but we don’t gain a sense of why their anger triggered action towards Bilott; a protagonist with links to the community who was only trying to help. Certainly Tennant was rude in his initial approach; although for all we know that could have been the original Tennant’s method of engagement. It’s hard to distinguish what has been dramatized and what actually occurred. Watching the cows was quite gory and this certainly isn’t a movie to be watching as you chew through your evening steak. Pullman really seems to have let himself go; and it was a similar appearance when I last saw him. There’s few moments of suspense in this film (other than perhaps when Bilott receives his result) but it does make you wonder about the products that we use and the chemicals involved.

Sunday 14 March 2021

One for the Road

Having seen two excellent sites, we opted for a third and drove east to visit The Sanctuary. However, this was very disappointing. A small field contained polished black bricks where a stone circle might have been. Apart from that the field was pretty much bare. It was somewhat of an anti-climax for our visit to the area but we had to push on and get some driving done. We had to push through some roadworks at Devizes but got to Cheddar in plenty of time. We had to drive up a very narrow access road to reach the car park, and I was slightly concerned that we were behind a primary school. However, the room was cosy enough and contained only ourselves for the first night. The reception was little more than a small office which sold snacks, alcohol and acted as an information desk. Once we’d claimed our kitchen space, we decided to spruce ourselves up and head out to Wells for a reconnaissance walk.

Saturday 13 March 2021

"Once you start believing in yourself, anything is possible. Once you start believing in yourself, your dreams take shape. The more you believe, the more you achieve.

-Martina Navratilova.

I want to be a writer. I practice every day. I know that I can do it, but the world around me provides so many distractions. In the end, I run out of energy to obtain my goal. But everyone has to start somewhere. This means that I must practice, practice, practice, whatever happens. I must always find time otherwise all hope will be beaten out of me. Even a small post like this goes to help in some manner. I’ve got to keep believing without giving up and keep trying to make my dream real. If I can make steps that I can follow, then there’s no reason why my dreams can’t become a reality. All I need is a plan to make the impossible possible. And if I’ve got support around me then things will get a lot easier. I just need to take the first step and move forward.

Friday 12 March 2021

Stoned Shenanigans

There were some very strange rocks in the stone circle. Some were fondled a bit too much. One was shaped either like a claw or a crown. Others were in the shape of a fist but with a bit of imagination you could see a face. We also saw a fish that had to be tickled and a portal gate. After glancing at our map we still had some time to spare before heading off to our next digs. After a brief visit to the hippy village shop we decided to extend our tour. A short drive down the road took us to a lay-by to visit a Neolithic tomb at West Kennett Long Barrow. We followed a dirt track through a farmer’s field to reach this eerie site, and we could go in and see the carvings. Another hill that had to be conquered was Silbury Hill which was just opposite and happened to be Britain’s largest man-made mound. A fence discouraged people from climbing it but I saw that it didn’t stop others so it certainly wasn’t going to stop me. 

 

Thursday 11 March 2021

Under Pressure

With the world going mad in a pandemic, it’s sometimes difficult to get hold of medical equipment when you want to monitor your health; and it’s more frustrating when you have a diagnosed condition rather than paranoia. But I managed to collect this from nearby store that was just an extra few miles’ drive between work and home. And for a piece of medical equipment, it’s very easy to use once you figure out how to wear the cuff. The display is big and bold and after demonstrating how to use it to my mother she’s able to take her blood pressure by herself now. It makes a low vibrating noise that may alarm you at first if you haven’t used one before but it’s easy enough to get used to and enter a routine of recording your measurements as part of your day. There’s even a handy chart to compare yourself to the average adult before you start calling 999.  

Wednesday 10 March 2021

Rocking about Rocks

Our next stop was to the lesser known village of Avebury which is known for its stone circles that are bigger than Stonehenge. Rather than being roped off and put on display to the public, the whole modern village including its pub has been built up and around this site. My English Heritage membership granted us free parking to the site so we followed the laid-out dirt track into the high street and over to the visitor’s centre. We then discovered that a very reasonably priced guide walk was departing within the hour, so we got tickets and a coffee to pass the time. It was a very informative walk and we learnt why some stones were bigger than others; which ones marked the gates to the Neolithic village and tried to spot patterns in others. Our guide was very friendly and informative and there was a good mixture of Brits and Americans on the tour. Then it was time to go and pose for ourselves.

 

Tuesday 9 March 2021

Stick or Twist

I haven’t done my assignment. It’s due today. I’ve just lost focus and haven’t had the time to finish it. Hopefully I won’t be called upon to give any answers and I can get it done as a priority first thing this evening. Maybe I’ll be lucky and there’ll be a change to the lesson plan so that I can get away with it. Or maybe I’ll get into a lot of trouble. I’m trying to act as nonchalantly as possible as we make our way to class but my heart is pounding as we enter the classroom and take our seats. Somehow I manage to end up at the front of the room. The question is asked and I’m called upon to answer. Then after one quick and honest “I dunno”, the teacher moves onto someone else and I breathe a sigh of relief; though I feel much better when I get out of the classroom so that I’m not called upon again or challenged as to if I did the assignment. I’ll feel even better as soon as I sit down and get the task done tonight.

Monday 8 March 2021

Conquering Cooper's

Our final stop for the day was to Cooper’s Hill, a steep incline famous for its tradition of people chasing giant cheeses down it. We had a history of rolling down steep hills and once rolled down the hill home after a night out at the pub. We managed to find a small lay-by outside a farm that acted as a par park then we had quite a climb up through a wood to get to the top. The hill itself was certainly a drop and the view itself was nothing short of spectacular. But what ruined it was a bout of health and safety as a fence had been erected to dissuade people from taking up the challenge without a marshal present. We’d come prepared for this though as we’d bought a bag of Babybel cheeses to roll down the hill ourselves; though we had to wait for a few moments for a bit of privacy as we weren’t entirely sure if were desecrating a sacred place. Unfortunately the hill was quite grassy, so it was a bit hard to see which cheese travelled the furthest. There was also a debate as to whether we should unwrap them first. And when we ran out of supplies, the winner got to eat the final cheese.


Sunday 7 March 2021

Walshing it all Down

Tall and thin, he’s the proper wimp with the cheeky grin and thin wire-framed glasses, blond hair and a large quiff. His expensive smartwatch looks a little bog on his wrist. He’s always to back you up in everything that you say or do, and he’s willing to learn from others as well. He just wants to be on everyone’s side without any conflict. He dresses in thin summer clothes and trainers, occasionally with a jacket if it’s cold. He’s happy to rope the family in to give him the perfect background so that you can get a ride home if you’ve given one previously. He’s never one to take advantage of people. And now he’s found a cute little love nest in the next village with the occasional adventure into the countryside when time lets him. Meanwhile his new employer is just a walk away across a field so long as the company keeps him on furlough.

Saturday 6 March 2021

Berking around Berkeley

The second time round was much more fun, though my friend was convinced that the curators were following him around to make sure that he was behaving. I don’t blame them with all that silverware out on show. We particularly admired the sideboard which had carved heads for doorknobs and was decorated with erotica. The Grand Hall was being used to showcase an exhibition of Strictly Come Dancing costumes; which I thought was a shame as we weren’t free to explore the hall in its original state. In the grounds, we posed on top of various cannons and wandered around the gardens admiring the lilies in the reflecting pool. After exploring the small butterfly house, we had a wander around the gardens identifying the home-grown herbs, plants and vegetables and took a delightful tea in the giant yurt. Then we popped into the village to browse the shops and pick something up for tea. After popping outside for a debate, we settled on a stew.

Friday 5 March 2021

It takes two to Tangle #dreamdiary 104

There’s a teenage girl in the house. She’s small for her age and skinny and flat-chested, but she’s got lovely legs that go into a miniskirt. Her ambition seems to be a mother so that she can live off benefits and hang out with her friends all the time. I’m trying to get her into a career; but her party lifestyle doesn’t exactly make her employable. She tells me that she’s recently had a miscarriage. To cheer her up, I decide to take her for a drive and take her purse-type dog for a walk. I leave them in a park and pop into a shop for some water just as it’s closing. I’m unable to get served and I’m followed out by two annoying tots. I twist their wrist a little bit and they follow me out of the store. When I get back to the park a crowd gathers as a pair of lizards are mating in a field. We head back to the car but the lizards follow us. When I open the boot for the dog, the lizards are the first to jump in. We can’t get them out but it’s cold, so we climb in the car anyway and I start the engine to get us warm. The teenage girl starts to drive and takes the car into a cul-de-sac and hits an old Peugeot which slams into the wall of a house. The occupant comes out and I write down my name and address for him on a tax form.

Thursday 4 March 2021

Castle Capers

With a bit of intermittent weather abound, there was a bit of a debate as to where to visit the following day. Eventually we settled on Berkeley Castle as where better would there be to take shelter? It was a bit expensive but we made sure to get our money’s worth. On arrival we discovered that a free guided tour was to take place; so we spent some time wandering the grounds and taking some scenic shots before returning to the departure point. After watching a welcome video, we discovered that our tour group was to be a party of four led by a lovely lady who was dressed for the part of librarian. We particularly enjoyed the cellar where a local microbrewery leaves its casks to age, and the refurbishment of the kitchen when a film crew came to call. The castle’s well and dungeon was also very impressive. After the tour we decided to walk round at our own pace to revisit in more detail and to pose for photographs. 


Wednesday 3 March 2021

Animal of the Day

Alexa informs me that today’s Animal is the magpie and that it’s a member of the corvid family (but hopefully more than one step away from the covid family). She also tells me that it’s an urban legend that they collect shiny things. So where foes this urban myth come from? Perhaps it’s an excuse for maids to blame who have lost their rings or want to break off their engagement but don’t want to admit it.  And more importantly, who gets to decide the animal of the day and which facts accompany it? I wonder if it’s random and if it’s different from other people’s devices? It’s probably taken from an encyclopaedia, and there may be editorship involved as well. That would be a fun job. Let’s make tomorrow’s animal a penguin and buy some shares in the zoo as it’ll be sending subliminal messages for people to visit over the weekend.

Tuesday 2 March 2021

Foundation's Edge by Issac Asimov

Foundation's Edge (Foundation #4)Foundation's Edge by Isaac Asimov
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This is the most enjoyable book of the series so far, probably because it’s more of a tale of people actually travelling out to visit planets that they’d never been to before rather than comments of an assumed knowledge that we lack; and Pelorat was just what we needed. It’s still all confusing because of all the parallels; but the characters are easier to follow as their backgrounds are described in more detail. From the beginning I was on my guard as I fully expected any character to announce that they were an agent of another at any time. It was also a shame that we weren’t actually told what Seldon said during his appearance in the chamber; although the free-thinking in this book suggests that people would prefer to follow their own fate rather than one set out for them. I thought that Asimov should have built some anticipation when he revealed the location of the Second Foundation rather than the anti-climatic method that he did employ. I felt that it was too early and it meant that the reader already knew that some of the characters were being sent on a wild goose chase. But there were still many comic moments. Trevize seemed insistent to illustrate his background by proudly wearing a sash wherever he went. I was excited to meet the saga’s first lowly mechanoid and stumble upon the reason as to why robots hadn’t arrived sooner. And I loved the attitude of Bliss. It really introduced some much-needed humour into the saga. It will be interesting to see if the Foundationers are still keen to follow their future as they discover more about their past.

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Monday 1 March 2021

Stop Pregnant Women from being Infected with Covid 19

This was a petition that was sent to me on Twitter. It just doesn’t make sense. How can you stop pregnant women from getting Covid-19? Gathering a bunch of signatures isn’t going to make a law to discourage people from doing it. So what is good Ernest suggesting? Luckily, it’s nothing to do with the anti-vaxers. Instead, he’s campaigning for better protection for pregnant women. And fair play to him. But there’s a difference between what the individual want to do and what the law tells us to do. If the government could have it their way then everyone would be at home and we’d all just have to shelter. It would be like Christmas every day. The trouble is that the average home isn’t equipped to survive that long without supplies, and some people must be deployed to maintain our infrastructure too. It’s therefore up to the individual as to whether they should take the risk. Sorry Ernest, but we can’t molly-cuddle everyone and people do have the right to make decisions for themselves.