Personalise it!

There’s a landmark birthday approaching and we’re looking into ordering a vase. Getting a gift personalised from the internet can be difficult at times as what you see on the screen may not necessarily be what you receive. At the time, we’d narrowed it to two suppliers. One was quite cheap, but the design was limited and the engraving really looked like it should be on a beer glass rather than a vase. The other was much more expensive, but the coloured design stood out and you could personalise your message. We had plenty of characters to choose from, and the only negative reviews seemed to be the box it came in. We weren’t too bothered as we were pretty sure that our recipient would use it rather than store it so we gave it a shot. When it arrived, the glass looked good, but the inscription looked faded and watery as if it would rub off. We really should have popped into our local shop and I regret our choice. I just hope our recipient likes it.

Foundation 1 by Isaac Asimov

Foundation by Isaac Asimov
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I was disappointed with this story. It started so well with a newcomer to a new world. But rather than introduce us to the same narrator, we’re shown snapshots of characters who have been around for generations and we’re expected to figure out the differences ourselves. There’s extracts from the encyclopaedia but they don’t do the book justice. I felt that he could have been a bit more creative and have leant us an android to fill us in. Because of this, there’s little opportunity to connect with the characters in this book. They didn’t draw any warmth and the reader doesn’t follow them for long or form a connection before the next generation evolves. The tale also gets very political which destroys the original concept of a science-fiction novel. The conclusion made me wonder if our Brexit negotiators had to go through a similar process. It also mocks the principals of the Foundation and creates a god-like aura for successful predecessors. Hopefully things will improve.

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Fear

How can you write a frightfully scary story? You might not know your reader so it’s hard to guess their phobias other than typical stereotypes. Of course, making it too scary might discourage readers from pursuing your topic any further, whilst what some might fear could be hilarious to others. But if you create a character with feelings then you might create an engaging story even if it doesn’t chill your reader. You can create lots of suspense by throwing in the unexpected; providing that it’s not too bizarre. And dark places are awesome! You may not like going into them because you don’t know where you’re going to end up, but the feeling and the transformation when you come out of them can be fantastic. While the unknown may create suspension for the reader and encourages them to read on; it may even help the reader to cope with their situation. 

Bar Mat Hat

I have a hat made of bar mats. It’s probably one of those things that I’ve kept longer than I should, and it should have ended up in the bin ages ago. But it’s genius! It’s basically a cardboard hospital bedpan/sick bowl that’s had bar mats artfully glued to it. I got mine at Dudley Winter Ales Fayre where a group of scouts had a production line set up to make them for charity and they could not get them out fast enough. Over the past few years the mats have come loose. I’ve tried to repair it by adding Pritt Stick to the beer mats but the mats still fall off. I probably need the PVC kind with a brush that you buy by the jug for a primary school. I’ve often thought of adding string and bottlecaps to it and a plastic pint as a centrepiece to enter in the hat day at the Great British Beer Festival; but it’s one of those occasions that I haven’t had the opportunity to attend in recent years. 

 

Maintenance Man #dreamdiary100

I’ve arrived at a school to help repair some furnishings. I’m wearing a traditional handyman’s white apron and large black boots. I’m carrying two large plastic poles. One is about three foot and the other is around seven foot. I’ve got no idea where I’m putting them up. I carry the poles into reception and sign the visitor’s book. The receptionist; a thin elderly woman with narrow glasses; tells me the room number and summons a pair of twin girls to show me the way. The trouble is that they’re quite young and they don’t understand the schools mapping system; they only know it by who teaches in which classroom. They lead me back outside then into a separate block then they stop in the building entrance and look confused. They tell me that they think it’s in here but they’re not sure which room. We walk into the first classroom on the left to discover that It already has blinds fitted. However, upon exiting the classroom I spot a map by the building’s fire alarm system. A quick study tells me where I need to go and it’s not long before I’m saying goodbye to the girls and getting to work.

Blurred

I have a lot of blurry photos. They’re not great to look at or publish; but sometimes it’s the only shot that you can get; especially in an action sequence. So when you get a chance to edit them, it’s only natural to try and sharpen them up for a better shot. But can the software really correct the lens? Or should the lens be sharp in the first place? I’ve never had much success with this. Usually, the effects just tones up the colour some more. If the camera software had stabilisation technology, then photography would be so much easier and there should be an option to blur the image afterwards should you need to. But instead, you’re begging the computer to do its magic because you missed the opportunity to take the shot again. It’s either that or run the risk of being a lousy photographer unless you choose not to publish the shot at all.

 

Bodged Job #dreamdiary100

I’m running late for a delivery job. We’re hanging out in what I thought was an abandoned garage. I’m waiting for a van so that we can fill up its tyres. Meanwhile, one of the newer drivers admits that he’s a bit nervous about driving his van so I agree to accompany him on a test run. At a five-point roundabout I tell him to take the second exit but rather than waiting in the queue he decides to mount the kerb and drive alongside the adjacent pavement. ‘I thought that we could do that as we’re delivery drivers’ he explains. I dismiss him then open the doors to the garage. I decide that as soon as my van arrives I’ll leave it in the garage and go out in my employee’s van. The trouble is that his first delivery was a microwave. As I’m holding the microwave, I hear a noise coming from the corridors in the back. It turns out that the garage isn’t abandoned but it’s a warehouse for microwaves! I realise that the microwave that I’m holding could be mistaken for one of theirs. On my way out, I’m forced into a team meeting where a variety of thefts are discussed, and they begin to show images from CCTV. Fortunately, they can’t get it working. I decide to return to my van and slowly walk away with my microwave while a security guard watches me. 

Knot that Way!

I often get knots in my hair. I have no idea how they’re formed. I usually notice them when my haircut is overdue. They’re quite painful to remove. I usually go through my hair with a comb after a shower to try and defuse them; and end up ripping through them. There’s always some that I miss and they’re quite time-consuming for the barber to remove. I don’t understand why he can’t cut them out. I guess it’ll leave me with a great big bald patch or something. There’s three theories as to how these knots are formed; the first is usually nature’s way of telling me that a haircut is overdue. My former barber used to believe that I’m a restless sleeper and my head movements cause my hair to fall into disarray. My current barber has put it down to a lot of hat wear; particularly in winter. It hasn’t happened for a while lately. Maybe there’s less hair to be knotted. Worrying.

Double Trouble

 Mum’s TV went kaput. She has a small one in the bedroom to doze off on when she can’t get to sleep at night. Anyway, one moment there was a picture and the next there was just a black screen with a colourful wibbly line. She could still get perfect sound but it looked like the screen had given up. So one of my little jobs for the day was to sort her out a new TV. A quick search online found a good brand at a reasonable price; but we also found a lower brand one that was smart for the same price. After a quick explanation she was keen on the idea so the TV was duly collected. Just before I started ripping out the packaging, I thought it best to give the stand a good clean so that I wouldn’t get dust into the rest of the room. As I did this, I though I’d try the dust-free TV one last time before its trip to the tip…and it worked first time! It looked like some of the screen had come loose at the top which exposed some white backing; but now we have two TVs and a decision to make!

Timing it Right

I hate waiting. The last thing that you want to do is to sit around and wait; especially in these troubled times. But it could be bad news for the barber; especially if they’re on their own. He might want a break; and you need him to be fresh and attentive so that you’ll be confident that they’ll do a good job. But if he’s a good barber and he runs his own business then he’ll be happy enough that some money’s going into the till. If someone’s already in the chair, at least that gives you a bit of breathing space to relax and prepare yourself after your walk. You can watch the TV or dive into the magazine for ideas for small talk; though I usually each end up discussing holidays. But if there’s a lot of people you could be talking about the same old thing as it’s been discussed countless times before. I usually sit quiet if I’m in the chair as it usually means that I’ve been waiting for ages anyway. 

 

Pubs. Pints. People.

This enjoyable series looks at the bare necessities of beer and its pub culture including the people behind it and their stories. The trio of presenters bring enthusiastic banter to the show as they discuss events past and present alongside a different theme each week, though it does sound a little bit scripted at times. The in-house interviews are sometimes even more so. It gives people behind the scenes to chance to air their views on the brewing industry, but sometimes it’s the same old tale of how they grew a hobby into a business. Sometimes the feature just reflects the closing line of the segment which is created to reflect an often-stale soundbite. But it does present an interesting view of what the campaign is up to and injects some much-needed enthusiasm into its activities. I’ve sought out some of the brews that they recommend, and they haven’t failed to impress yet. I’m looking forward to a lockdown-free life where I hope they’ll encourage people to seek out a few recommended pubs.

The Cracks are Starting to Show...

There’s no-one technically handed in the art of home repair that resides in our house any more. Occasionally I look at things and think ‘has that always been like that?’ or ‘how long has that been there?’ I wonder if there’s a real catastrophe brewing. The other day I moved my bed and found a new hole in the wall. I can only guess that the mice made it when they plagued our house. My brother’s a builder and every time he comes round I wonder whether I should mention it or get him to do an annual appraisal of the house. This means that we’ll essentially be giving him more unpaid work to do when all he wants is to come round and relax. It’s either that or try and find an honest tradesman to invite into our home without charging too much of a fortune for something that should really not be worried about or it should be left alone. I should really make it a new year’s resolution to do something about it. At least I’m not the owner.

Keeping the Burglars at Bay

There’s an option on the smart speaker to create random sounds. It can create household noises such as leaving the TV on, kitchen activity with music in the background, and a dog barking. You can play them constantly or have them come on for random periods of time. But if a burglar looks through the window and doesn’t spot the dog, you have to wonder if he’s actually going to be deterred. He may also wonder how long you spend cooking and cleaning. And it’s no good playing kitchen sounds if you leave your smart speaker on in the bedroom. In fact it’s more likely that someone will break in just to see what’s going on out of curiosity. I’m thinking that it’d probably be easier to just leave the radio on; though even that would just infuriate someone who’s trying to deliver a package. This feature might best be saved for the next generation of smart speakers who can see their surroundings, though that in itself sounds a bit scary…

Hook Norton Cold Turkey at the Alexandra Arms, Rugby

We were looking forward to coming here as we knew that there was an on-site brewery. We walked in on a cold and wet late Saturday afternoon expecting the pub to be buzzing. We walked into a dark and dingy room. The woman serving our drinks didn’t seem the least bit interested in us other than taking our drink orders, and the beer wasn’t of great quality anyway. We retired to the back room which had a pool table and through the window we could see a makeshift shed which we assumed to be the brewery; but it was too wet for us to venture outside and investigate. We made good use of the pool table and stayed for another drink to sample more beer; though I was keen to move on. Towards the end of our game a band arrived to set themselves up for the evening, but no-one seemed bothered or even acknowledged our presence. Perhaps we visited on an off day. Since then I’ve discovered that they’ve had a refurbishment and they’ve even changed the name of the pub, so I’m willing to give it another go.

Turning Pages

This young man is short but not stubborn and never ignorant, with short tidy hair and freckles to match, occasionally with a bit of stubble. He started off as a Brummie commuting to a small town. He can get a bit obsessive in what he does and is cocky enough to be independent enough to lead the team and become a manager. Confidence never fails him, though he does flare up with embarrassment when he’s in the wrong. During a shelving exercise he was adamant not to waste any of the shelf clips and ensured that we always returned any excess clips to the storage bench. As a leaving present, we decided to get one engraved with his initials on it. We even put it in a ring box to make it look like a high-end piece of jewellery. He now has a family and his own store on the south coast. It’s amazing to see people progress and it’s nice to think that you’re a part of it.

What the Frijj?

I used to sneak these delicious milkshakes into the shopping trolley as I pushed it around with a hangover while my parents went left right and centre to fill it up. They keep for a few days but I usually gulped it straight from the bottle; mainly because our fridge was chocka. I haven’t bought them for a while now; mostly because they haven’t been on offer. Instead I’ve seen the smaller Yazoo shakes but they sound like they’re produced by a foreign internet company and I know that I’m supporting British farmers by sticking to my brand; even though it’s no longer associated with its former dairy. But how do you pronounce this? There’s only one way; as it sounds; but it’s very hard to say it without adding an ‘e’ on afterwards. Perhaps they were trying to market it as fresh milk pasteurised from the falls of majestic Norwegian fjords. So if you’ll excuse me; I gotta drink a fridge.

 

Living a Piece of History

Wouldn’t it be nice to live in somewhere different? Rather than being on an estate with four walls and a garden, you could live somewhere historic. Factories, cowsheds and anything with an interesting exterior are being torn open from inside and converted into residential properties. Buildings that once served the many are now being restricted to the few. It’s great to give the space a new lease of life; but shouldn’t this development be for the benefit of everyone? Often, the facilities inside won’t cater for everyday modern needs and alterations could be difficult. Residents will also have the disadvantage of people gawking at their building in awe and intruding on their personal space. My colleague once lived in a converted chapel and often faced being awaken on Sunday to be asked what time morning services started. Needles to say, she was not amused. It’s far better to lease these properties to a business who at least are more flexible of letting people inside.

The Naked Sun

The Naked Sun by Isaac Asimov
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This futuristic novel deals with so many issues that we’re facing at the present time. We learn about Solaria’s customs through the protagonist which is convenient for the reader but also promotes ignorance between these different worlds. The setting certainly makes for an interesting whodunnit! There’s also interesting debates about robotic philosophy which doesn’t require too much detail and Asimov illustrates them perfectly. I also love how he addresses isolation and the fact that Solarians are used to viewing people rather than seeing them. There are some important morals to be echoed here; and it’s great to see that most characters learn and reflect upon their experiences upon the story’s outcome; though I’m not entirely convinced whether Bayley’s suspect was justified. I’m also unsure as to whether the role of Daneel was necessary here; although his presence may fulfil an unknown role in the saga. I guess I’ll have to read on.

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A Jumping Journey #nuclearmermaid 16

Jenny slid and pulled along herself across the wet and dankly tiles. Right now, she could really use a set of wheels like how the biped got her there. She used the wall to balance herself upright and fit through the portal into the space beyond. Inside this room there were tons of clothes just like the bipeds wore. Could she pass herself off as one of them? If so, she could blend in to get herself back to the ocean; however far away that might be. The trouble was that she’d had so little experience with bipeds that she had no idea how these clothes were supposed to be worn. The clothes that she’d seen worn were very dull but the clothes here were light and colourful. Some were too small so she tossed them into a pile; bearing in mind that perhaps they could be used to cover different parts of her.

Tetley Bitter at the Bull, Rugby

As our pub crawl continued, things became hazy to recall. Records show that we did enter this pub and successfully recorded a Cask Marque visit, but we had nothing to show for it other than a quick half of Tetley bitter. It doesn’t sound as if we were inspired enough to stay. I may remember black timber beams, old wooden tables and a black painted bar but I could be merging my memories with that of pubs gone past. It looks like a traditional town pub that has been modernised to compete with its competitors to offer services that you’d expect of a chain pub. The square main entrance could suggest that it used to be a coaching inn with a recent extension on the left to accommodate more drinkers; but it’s hard to say for sure as there’s no historical records. There’s plenty of places to allow you to perch up and meet up with friends to watch live sports; but there’s no atmosphere to invite you to stay.

 

It's All About You

 The time has come to be upgraded! My current laptop turns ten and it’s running at a snail’s pace. It takes absolutely ages from booting up to the point where you’re ready to complete a task. Furthermore, it’s rapidly running out of disk space. Every time I want to save some edited photos, I find myself putting older albums onto an external hard drive to make room. Notification messages started to appear stating that errors had been detected but the computer wasn’t telling what they were. The whole thing needed moving onto a new system before I lost everything. But what to do? I didn’t want a quick fix; I needed something lasting but practical to see me through the next decade at least. A powerful laptop would be good, but now that I have a tablet would I still need one. A Mac would be nice but I was worried that some of my old programs wouldn’t work. But what about a traditional PC? I could customise it the way I want. Then I found a PC that’s built into a screen rather than a traditional tower. Problem solved.

Greene King Rocking Rudolph at the Lawrence Sheriff, Rugby

We were under the impression that this pub was a Wetherspoons. In fact, it might have been a Wetherspoons the last time we had come here. Some of the fixtures and fittings still had that chain pub element, but the menus were clearly different. The bar was quite plush, and the place looked like it was more of a night venue with the added bonus of a pub in the daytime due to its commercial centre location. We were relived to see that the handpumps were available, but they just had a small choice hidden in the corner. The staff were happy to answer our questions but didn’t really want to engage in conversation. We wondered how many people still knew that this was no longer tied to the chain. The beer was adequate, and we still managed to grab the Cask Marque scan that we came for thanks to sharing our location. 

 

Sporty College #dreamdiary99

I’m walking through the grounds of my old college. As I pass one of the classroom complexes, the footpath diverts around a tennis court opposite the building. It all looks modern, shiny and new and I start to wonder what was there before. Perhaps it was just open land. In any case, would it be ideally placed so close to the classrooms? The noise generated would certainly disturb lessons. Perhaps students are forbidden from playing during study time. I turn the corner and walk down a paved hill. Approaching me are three students in green basketball apparel. The centre student throws the basketball he is carrying and I’m ready to catch it but he leaps up and snatches it himself. Once we’ve passed, he throws the ball again and it hits me on the back of the head. I fall and books fall out of my backpack while his mates stand there smirking.

Wigan Brewhouse Pretoria at the Merchants Inn, Rugby

This pub is a fantastic establishment to explore and has its roots in a merchant’s building in the heart of the historic city on a backroad. There always a good atmosphere here and it’s a place where the intergenerational can mingle. The walls are of traditional wood, but you won’t notice them too much because of the amount of breweriana that adorns them. A horseshoe bar stretches round the centre of the open pub while long tables are placed at its other side. At its rear is a parlour room which is laid out according to whatever event the pub is catering to at the time. The young and friendly bar staff are always happy to see you, and there’s always a good choice of beers on. I was quite happy to stay here and sample more new brews but the group grew restless and wanted to move on. I’d love to return during one of the pub’s music events or to sample their lunchtime menu. 

Secret Snacks

You’ve been at work all day but you’ve got a horrible feeling that you’re not going to be rewarded with a justified meal at the end of it. That glance in the fridge as you prepare to leave the house gives you all you need to know; whether it’s something defrosting or the use-by date jumps out at you. And you know it’s probably not going to be great. The only way to combat it is to have an emergency snack prepared. But what can you get? If it’s something hot, it’s going to be expensive and it’s more likely to smell. Anything cold is cheap and cheerful, but might be extremely unhealthy to eat as a whole portion in one go. Sometimes you might be pleasantly surprised. You might have a whole load of extras thrown in or a huge side to fill the void. You’ve then got to hide and dispose of the snack in secret so as not to cause offence (that is if you haven’t eaten it already). You just can’t win. The only way is to control your own pantry.

Oakham Southern Cross at the Raglan Arms, Rugby

This small community pub is only a stone’s throw away from the commercial district of Rugby but it has all the feel of a small local, and despite the appearance of a tied house outside it had beers from three independent breweries within. There’s a couple of picnic benches outside its front doors for those who like their beer al fresco, but it’s still sealed off from the main street. Inside is a snug on the left while the right leads out into a long room that takes up the rest of the pub. The bar is in the middle and there’s a stage at the top of the stairs. The landlord here was very friendly and instantly took an interest in where we were from and our plans for the day. We visited this pub before the grand refurbishment; and it’s now tied to Black Country Ales. I’ve not a chance to visit yet.

Spooks: The Greater Good

This was an interesting film with plenty of action sequences and it was great to see the characters out and about more often than sitting behind their desks. It was great to see some guest appearances from the series cast, even if they were slowly being killed off one by one. But once again we see the section head at all odds with the world with everything to play for to uncover a conspiracy that we see little evidence for. Mace was his usual boisterous self and as usual I was quite surprised that he didn’t have anything to do with the conspiracy. I spent a lot of time trying to work out whether the Holloway character was covered in the series, and it would have made a lot more sense if an introductory sequence was filmed. In the end the plot suits the title, but it doesn’t necessarily justify Harry’s rogue actions to conduct the investigation. And of course, there’s still the classics Spooks finish which still doesn’t define the legacy of Harry Pearce.

Byatt's Phoenix Gold at the Rugby Tap Room, Rugby

We were looking forward to this next pub. It was a former shop that had been converted into an independent bar; and we’d set some time aside to spend longer here if we wanted to. We were really looking forward to sampling some new brews. But we needn’t had bothered. A long line of pews were pushed up against the narrow room with a row of twelve casks at the end, but only two beers were available which were more local to us than the pub. These were poured slowly and unenthusiastically by a half-asleep barman. We crowded around a small circular table near the end of one of the pews opposite while we decided what to do next. We certainly weren’t inspired enough to peruse the bookshelves or open up a board game. Instead, I went to talk to the bottle-shop owner who shared the shop’s entrance for a much more stimulating conversation. It’s a shame that we had more pubs to visit as at least his brews were interesting; but he didn’t have a license to sell them on the premises. It was a shame that these two businesses didn’t merge. We finished our drinks and invested our extra time into exploring other pubs in the area. 

"If you remain humble, people will give you love and respect even after you have finished with the game. As a parent, I would be happier hearing people say 'Sachin is a good human being' than 'Sachin is a great cricketer' any day.

It’s great to show your passion after a victory but do you really need to brag about it? As an athlete, you might let off a bit of steam; but it’s still important to be respectful to your opponent. After all, they participated in your victory and helped you to achieve it, didn’t they? And for the audience, it’s not necessarily a victory for them (unless they’ve placed a bet on you). For them it’s about the story of your journey and how you got to where you are. So if you’re going to spend the rest of your days boasting of your victory then people will become tired of you very quickly once you’ve achieved your goal. But if you can recognise that it’s not just you who made the magic happen then people will envisage you as someone who cares about those around him. You might have earnt something; but you still need to recognise the responsibilities that come with victory. 

Branscombe Vale Branoc at the Rupert Brooke, Rugby

This was an odd location for a pub, or at least it was for the way that we approached it. It seemed that we left the main high street by talking through a service road towards the back of the shops which brought us out onto a large open car park. The pub was opposite. Inside was a few tables overlooking a large timbered roof and a flight of steps led us down to the bar opposite a long line of open-plan tables. The beer was functional but the atmosphere was uninspiring and it felt like we’d wandered into a barn that had been converted into a clubhouse. We wondered what the building had been before and whether it was some type of showroom. Apparently it used to host an indoor market which would explain its location. We didn’t feel the bard’s presence or recognise any of his works, so on we wandered.

 

Intriguing Characters

Who is this person? Why are they doing that? Why should I care. You might read a lot of stories where there’s plenty of action, but they can be a bit hard to follow if you don’t know anything about the characters and how they react to it. Otherwise you may as well be reading a manuscript for a movie. Stories should make the reader want to find out more about the characters rather than predict what is going to happen to them. A bit of backtracking never did anyone any harm and it certainly fills in a few blank pages. It also gives you the opportunity to display how unique your character is and show their traits and attributes. But you might want to keep some things a mystery to encourage your reader to read more and not make your character’s reactions so predictable. Otherwise it would be quite easy for the reader to foresee the rest of your story.