Hops @ Home

The idea of this podcast was interesting. It would take on a similar format each episode with a different set of interesting guests from around the area to ask their opinion on how things are progressing. There’s also a brief update on community initiatives. The major thing that let it down was the narrator and the dodgy soundbites that preceded each segment. He was just too slow and lacked passion whatsoever. It was great that he was speaking loud and clear but he would be better off sticking to train station announcements. I’d hate to talk to that all night in the pub. There were also too many intros and formal titles that needed to be explained in detail. And how do you “just have time” in a podcast where previous episodes were longer. The sound quality also varied considerably. But what it has made me do is see what else is out there. 

Beeston Castle by Robert Liddiard & Rachel McGuicken

Beeston Castle by Robert Liddiard
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

The book contains some insightful history which would otherwise have been hidden due to the lack of information boards on the site. But as a modern-day practical guide; it lacks several features. Its size is hardly practical for the visiting tourist and it seems to neglect any mention of the recreation of a woodland walk and a reconstruction of a roundhouse within its ream. There’s a lot of assumption that people would already be familiar with certain terms and so no explanation is enclosed. There’s also no mention of future planned restoration projects or how to get further involved with the site. There’s a brief mention of a community fete but there’s no inclusion to persuade visitors to return. I think that there could also be better descriptions of the surrounding landscape; the castle may have been built to keep out the Welsh but we’re in modern times now and it would be nice to know which “Welsh Hill” we’re looking at; especially if we want to visit these hills to see the castle from afar. A bit of revision is needed here to bring this book into the twenty-first century to encourage people to explore the area in more detail.

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A Devious Deed #Empress5

 As Zhong gazed at the enormity in front of him, he wasn’t entirely sure that a foot had just disappeared from the corner of her luscious red lips.

‘Proceed’ she said.

‘My empress, I come to beg favour over my neighbour’s paddy field. My family has harvested this land for many years and I enclose the deeds herewith. Lately, my neighbour has not been maintaining his fence and his livestock have broken through to eat our crops. All I ask is that we keep the right to farm our own land without being disturbed.’

‘Show me the deed.’ A nearby guard reached out and took the rolled-up papers in front of Zhong. He passed it up to the empress on a large pole underneath a huge magnifying glass. There was a deathly silence while the information was processed.

‘Your neighbour seems to have a very large estate. Very large indeed.’

‘Yes, my Empress. All I ask is that my family continue to uphold our traditions unabated.’

‘Very well, here is what will happen. I will evict your neighbour for the insolence that he has paid you. This eviction will happen as soon as possible; but while this is taking place you must reside here with any persons or possessions you wish to keep. But once the eviction is completed; you must farm all the land with rice in return. Do you understand?’

‘Yes, my Empress.’

‘Then get going. Inform my staff of your return and they will make arrangements for stowage.’

‘Thank you, my Empress.’

As Zhong left, the Empress grinned. She loved a feast.

Look up, Look down, Look all Around...

Occasionally, we can’t find things. We look on the shelf and they’re not there. Usually we resort to other stock first to fulfil the customer’s order then pop back later to find the missing item; but occasionally we can’t do this because it’s the last one. Sometimes it’s quicker to bring in a pair of fresh eyes to seek the item. Has it been pushed to the back of the shelf or knocked through to the shelf behind or to the side? Has it been knocked to the floor then put onto a different shelf by accident? Or is there something else on the shelf in its place? To that end, we need to get the computer involved to see if the wrong item has been given out; especially if it’s of greater value and has a similar product number. And how long has it been missing for? Can we account as to who saw it last? 
 

"It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and happened to things."

 -Leonardo da Vinci.

It’s nice when you’re determined to get things done. You get a feeling of satisfying accomplishment at the end. But often, life has other plans. It throws up obstacles that prevent you from dedicating the time that you would like. That’s why you’ve got to seize every opportunity. You can’t keep putting things off. If you suddenly find that you’ve got time to yourself; use it well because you don’t know what opportunities will be available later. You’ve got to stand up for yourself and chase every lead; though it does get to a point where you can be too obsessive with this. It’s fine to chase this but if you’re going to walk all over people and not offer anything new then they’re going to be less keen to help you out. But at the same time, it’s important to let people know how important these things are to you and that you’re not going to give up easily.

The Wrong Trousers

My work trousers are falling apart. I asked for a new pair a year ago (it might have been two). I got issued three pairs to replace the current ones but a week later I took a pair back because the buckle holder had come off. I brought them back to my manager explaining that I assumed that they would be under some sort of guarantee but I never received a replacement pair. I struggle on with the pair that I’ve got only to find the same thing happen three weeks later. The zipper can’t fasten all the way up but luckily I wear a belt to holster the headset that I use. It gets worse. The stitches underneath the zipper is coming undone. Luckily my polo shirt just about covers that area when I’m standing up, but when I’m sitting down I have to have my legs together and hope that I remembered to wear black underwear.

 

What does sound look like?

 Sound is vibration. You may not be able to see the cause of it, but it can help you work out that something is moving. Any machine creates rumbling that you might be able to feel; even in you can’t hear it. Even something moving through the air makes a whooshing sound; though you might not be close enough to hear it. It’s as if your ears have a sense of radar to guide you. You might even see wavy lines as if something’s moving through the air. But when you lose you sense of sound; you must rely on your eyes to guide you. It’s amazing what you miss out on; whether it’s the everyday hustle and bustle of what’s happening outside your door or overhearing others going about their daily business. It’s also difficult to understand people, and it’s only by looking at their body language can you attempt to guess what they want.

Getting it done with a Zebra

I suppose the analogy says it all. It’s simple to get your tasks done in a zip and that you can see everything in black and white. But not all is as it seems. The thing itself is quite bulky. It’s too big to fit into a pocket, but it does come with an elasticated strap so that you can wear it on your wrist and pretend that you’re the company version of Iron Man; even though you’re only armed with a barcode scanner and very basic AI that you’re probably going to argue with every time it holds you up. But first, you’ve got to unlock the thing by remembering the password that you’ve been given. Then after choosing the task that you want to do; you’ve got to log into that as well; assuming that you’re using the right password for the right button. And if nothing seems to be happening almost instantly; you’ve got to decide whether it’s worth holding out or whether it’s quicker to re-boot the thing and start the whole damn process again.

 

Animal Heroes

I heard a large bang. It sounded as if something had crashed into the window. I went to investigate and saw a massive bird-shaped outline newly imprinted on the glass. Beyond the window I sensed movement. I cast my eye over the road to the house directly opposite us. On its rooftop was a pigeon. It was staggering around in a daze and it wasn’t hard to assume that this was the culprit who had recently created our stained-glass window. As I watched it, it got closer and closer to the edge of the rooftop. Just as it put a foot over the edge, a second burst of wings appeared from overhead. A second pigeon had its eye on this one and had flown itself into the dazed pigeon to stop it from falling off. I’ve got no idea whether they were mates or from the same nest; or whether it was just a lonesome superhero.

Product Description

There’s some great descriptions that the company gives us to help us find their items. We’re supposed to look at the product number rather than the item description to ensure that we’ve found the correct one; but when we get to a shelf with a lot of items or we just can’t see what we’re looking for; a description really helps. Sometimes the descriptions are hilarious. When we use the voice system, Star Wars becomes a set of directions and pyjamas become pies. But sometimes the description is quite random. It could often be a model number rather than a product which doesn’t really help. And when it’s printed off on a ticket; the computer often runs out of characters. If you’re handing the item out, you often need to look up a picture of the item to discover what’s within its packaging. What’s needed is more of a humane description and less of categorising the product as part of a range.

King of the Gingers

He’s tall, skinny and smart with short hair; always impeccably groomed with a pristine ironed shirt, crisp tie and shiny shoes. It’s as if he takes pride in being ginger; there’s nothing that he can do about it and he’s prepared not to give anyone any more ammunition. A perfect schoolboy; he’s no leader of the pack but the perfect sidekick willing to enforce any manifesto. He’s confident in everything that he says and does and speaks without hesitation. He’s always ready to hang out with the pack and he’s willing to make a few practical jokes without offending anyone too much. But an individual conversation will reveal that he’s capable of his own thoughts too and he knows what he’s doing. But it’s hard to take an interest in someone’s past when he agrees with everyone; and when he’s not around it’s hard to imagine that he ever was.

The Blue Gate

The numbers are trying to escape! They’ve flew down the wires and onto the screen. The only thing from holding them back are the blue lines that form a gate to stop them from progressing any further. To us, it’s like the silhouette of a giant oyster, and the numbers within them floating up to the top of the screen represent pearls or at least the mullah that we get from selling them. To them, it’s like staring through the pearly gates of heaven in digital form; desiring to be on the shelf and part of the real world. If another one came along and stood on top of the others; it might have a chance of jumping over the gate. But it’s only the troubled ones that we’ve summoned to our screen anyway. The rest are not a problem; mainly because they’ve behaved themselves and have been dealt with; pushed further into the reaches of the screen.

 

Beer in a Box

I’ve been looking for a good supplier of of-trade beer for a while. Then one day an offer came up to get a box delivered to my door for free. I thought I’d give it a go as I could cancel any time. But before I’d managed to empty the box of its contents, another one arrived. Oh well I thought, at least I’d got two for the price of one. That quickly became three for two then four for three. At one point, I had three boxes on the go. I was just about to cancel then the lockdown kicked in and the pubs shut. It also changed my work habits but I did manage to make quite a dent in the quantity of beers on the shelf. It suddenly became useful. Some of the beers are very nice, while others are very artificial and aren’t necessarily ones that I’d choose. I did come close to quitting but they provided a mixed case option so I’ve subscribed to that instead. You get cans as well as bottles which I’ve not fond of and it’s a smaller serving; but you also get a snack (usually nuts) and a magazine. The articles can be a bit repetitive as they often tell the same stories; but they’re always portrayed as an adventure in beer. I think the editors are still sampling when it comes to publication as plenty of errors blend through. There’s also a loyalty points scheme where you can rate the beers you try and spend these points on beers of your choice. This month’s box is late. They’re blaming the pandemic that they’ve been busy shipping out their orders for their upcoming beer festival. I’m also due a book which hasn’t arrived yet. And cancelling can’t be done online; you have to call them up and listen to their sales pitch. It’s time to see how good their customer service is. 

Mexican Stand-off

I was once given the task of helping to set up another store. It was a commute of 36 miles to get there from my town into the suburb of a city. It took an hour to get there because of traffic and another 45 minutes to get back. I was told that I could claim back petrol costs if I kept hold of my receipts and filled in a form upon my return which was duly completed. I was then told that the money would be paid into my salary. Two pay checks came and went but I still hadn’t received my expenses. My manager said that he would chase it up but I didn’t see any action happen. So one day I announced that I wouldn’t complete any work until I was paid. I sat in the office for a full hour refusing any task until I had cash in my hand or I saw relevant action to demonstrate that the task was completed. It only took an hour for him to pay up.

 

What is the best answer in an interview for the reason as to why you are leaving your current employer for a candidate who has no honest reason?

 There’s lots of reasons as to why you’d want to leave your current employer; but these aren’t necessarily going to convince a potential new employer to hire you. If there’s been a change in your personal circumstances it’s worth being honest so long as you can put a positive spin on it to avoid these issues from backfiring on you. The best answers are to illustrate how the company can utilise your skills to give them the edge over their competitors; but don’t spend too long comparing roles. You need to be prepared to sell your transferable skills. Dwelling on the past too much can hinder this; as no-one wants to take on too much baggage. And if you’re relying on your current employer for a reference; you need to remain as positive as possible. The last thing that you want is to create friction between current and future employers which may leave you with no employment at all.

Weighing it all Up

Some of our items come in more than one box. We often have to tell the customer this before they disappear in case they think that’s everything and they don’t come back for the rest. Occasionally we must tell our own staff this too. We’ve had instances where we’ve struggled to find the second part of something only to conclude that the delivery team member wasn’t aware that a second part was required. And then there’s the fun of trying to get hold of a second part. If a customer has already purchased it then time is of the essence. Sometimes they’re happy to head off and start building with the part that they’ve got if they can. But if no-one’s waiting, we must fill in a form to let the distribution centre know. Sometimes they’ll give a direct response saying that they’ve that dispatched the item. Sometimes they say that they’ve despatched the item but we never see it. At this point we give up and send back the parts that we have. And occasionally; but very rarely; they admit that they’re out of stock and that we should send back the parts anyway.

 

Journalists to stop effort

A local journalist thinks she can make a living of writing by stealing the hard work of others instead of getting her arse out of the office and doing some proper work. She’s decided to write about pub gardens and the headline photograph immediately credits its source to social media. The first item’s photo is just a shot from Google Street View. It shows an unmarked road with a pothole holding cars which are pointed at fences with some rubbish dumped alongside the hedge. In the distance we see the pub’s sign covered by ivy and a few picnic tables with umbrellas. It’s probably not the most picturesque of photos to entice you; and if I was the licensee I’d be having a strong word with the publisher regarding this photograph.  Future items are padded out with quotes from a travel review site rather than any display of having any personal empathy or endorsement with the premises. Instead, she does the searching so you don’t have to. Even the platform that she publishes on struggles to load the full page properly on a mobile device because of the amount of advertising that loads. Is this what counts as journalism these days? It may be a slow news day; but hopefully people will see it for the bodged job that it is and won’t accept it at any face value.

Needle in a Haystack

These poor dolphins must already be in pain as they’ve had half their bodies ripped out so that they can be stuffed with shiny stones. Now they’ve had a metal bar pinned to them so they can be shoved like a stake into someone’s ear; all in the name of beauty. The dolphins put on a solemn face, and it’s probably because of their pain that they’re not smiling. Maybe they’re asleep. Oddly, there’s no picture of anyone modelling them to show how they fit. Instead, there’s a video with a verbal description telling the viewer how they fit while spinning around a piece of foam shaped like a sea-lion. Perhaps it’s to disguise the small size which would otherwise discourage people from buying them. Or maybe it’s the idea of having a piece of metal clipped around your ear. Nevertheless, they could be handy if you need to disguise a blade.

Sherlock

This was a great concept; bringing a classic character into a modern era; and the Christmas special was just ingenious. Little detail is omitted and they even included the deerstalker; though it does look out of place (although Sherlock never admits to loathing it). It’s also good to see action scenes but few with Sherlock acting as an inhibitor. They’re shot as feature-length movies rather than full episodes, and you really do have to concentrate to see each part through. I was disappointed with the climax; it suddenly became very paternal. I’d be interested in seeing more, although it’ll be a bit harder now that Cumberbatch and Freeman have got a few Hollywood titles under their belt. They’d also have to devise a new villain and dig up some more of each character’s past as well, maybe even have Sherlock sent in as a negotiator. Now I’ve got to read the books to see if Doyle’s character was just as critical. 

Gone with the Wind

Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I can see why people regard this as an American classic. An elitist socialite put against the backdrop of a defining historical context is sure to have something for everyone. But despite all the protagonist’s suffering I just can’t sympathise with Scarlet. She doesn’t seem to undergo any change until she realises that it’s too late; and it’s this selfish character that I loathe. The world changes but she refuses to; her only goal is to move forwards while putting the past behind her too quickly and she never seems to age and accomplishes too much too young. She never exhibits true passion in whatever she does and for this she remains to me a fake character. But is this the only way to success? Is her immortality the attitude that Americans carry forwards in their selfish ways? The other irritating thing about this novel is the colloquial speech. It really is a pain to understand what these folks are saying. I was also disappointed to learn that Butler’s closing line wasn’t the same as the film. But what the novel does do will is supply an interesting context on the lives of everyday people during a time of civil unrest.

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Bridging the Gap #nuclearmermaid13

Ever since her capture, she’d always dined on fish and plant life. The best fish that she’d had was while she was growing up in the square box. She wondered what the biped would taste like. It looked always looked soft and squishy around the midriff. Since she couldn’t leave the water, she had to find a way to lure it into the water. Perhaps if she starved herself, it would come closer to the water to see what was wrong with the fish that it threw. Then if she timed it right, she could pull him in. it would be a difficult challenge because she found herself always hungry lately. Perhaps it was because of the lack of vegetation in the stone walls. She’d found traces of green within the stones but it wasn’t enough to satisfy her. But what she did find was a crack where the fungus had been. 

Riding Shotgun

I always thought that the safest seat in the car was the front passenger seat. You get to choose your leg room; you’ve got the best view and you’re one of the first to see what’s coming up. Although in a crash situation, that can be quite scary. You won’t know how your driver will react and your reaction might counteract his. If it’s a serious crash; you’ve also got a fair share of glass in front of you. It certainly makes me think where I’ll sit next time I get into a cab. It also explains the term riding shotgun; though there’s very few drivers that give you complimentary arms anymore. It’s also probably why we’re encouraged to place infants in the rear seat so that they won’t get scared at all. Hopefully they’ll just get bored by the dull fabric. But then they cause a distraction in themselves as you’re constantly ensuring that they’re OK. 

 

Spaceships

Everything these days has to move fast. Companies need to be at the centre of everything but sometimes there’ll be and edge to their distribution network which will require them to expand their territory or lose the business. But what if everything could be in one place? Rather than have a network of warehouses there would be just one supported my millions of staff. These people would live and work on rolling shifts on the premises with pre-arranged leave time or commuter shuttles. They would constantly battle drones and robots to save their jobs but the lab would insist on experimenting to save on those extortionate labour costs.  And the best bit would be the spaceships that they get to drive to deliver the goods. If they can’t find a parking space they just hover above the address and lower themselves down on a rope. They’ll still probably block someone’s view. 

Elf Help

Christmas can be too much work. Gone are the days where you get up and presents suddenly materialise underneath a tree followed by chocolate galore and toys that you always wanted alongside a great big dinner with people that you haven’t seen for at least a year but you’re not bothered because you’ve got all this cool new stuff to play with! Nowadays someone must put the effort in to make the magic happen. And the later you leave it the less magical it seems. It would be nice, but also a bit scary if someone else did it for you. Would they organise it the way you want it? If so, that would be amazing. If not, you’d have someone to complain to; but they could always turn around and say at least they attempted to make the magic happen and that everyone would just be sitting around the breakfast table if they didn’t. So planning is key. Time to get going.

 

Oops

I didn’t mean to do it. I had the best intention to complete an entirely different action. This is just what transpired instead. All I wanted was a little light to help me start my day. So I reached out for a little assistance. But my finger just couldn’t find the switch to the bedside light. I poked around and reached a little further and the next thing I heard was a crash. Now I had to get out of bed to turn on the main light to see what I had done. But before I could ponder getting up, this was done for me.

‘What are you doing making all this noise? I thought there’d been a break-in!’

‘I didn’t mean to; I just knocked the light off the bedside table.’

‘Just look at this mess. We’re going to have to get a new lamp now all because of your clumsiness.’

Return to the Gym

My regular gym is back open. I’ve been meaning to go for a while but my head’s been full of wax which meant that I wouldn’t be able to hear any of the instructors properly. This meant that I missed taking part in their opening week for free. Fortunately, the following month was half-price but I was still blocked up; but then my luck held out and the following month was half-price as well. After giving on the on-line booking system; I made a telephone call to discover that I couldn’t book more than seven days in advance. But once I finally got a slot; getting in was a cinch. I checked in with the staff member on the door and never even had to swipe my card as the gates were already open. Then I headed upstairs and grabbed my very own spray and cloth to clean the machines with. Getting out was a bit of a problem as I could only see no exit signs anywhere. I tried to watch the videos on my phone but in the end I ended up going out the same way that I came in. Maybe they think I’m special. But after watching the videos when I returned home; I’m beginning to think that they’re special.

 

"As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others."

 -Bill Gates. I’ve been working with a variety of different leaders for a long time. I’ve now got to the point where they won’t teach me anything new; or at least they don’t want to. I’ve seen them struggle with many situations where I thought they could have been handled better with a little bit more thought and care. And I’ve seen situations where at the end of the day they just want to do their job to ensure salary while protecting the security of the business that they manage. I seem to learn more about new things when others complain about them; while at the same time I see these leaders unable to influence a change to create a better outcome for everyone. My leaders have become my peers and the only empowerment that I feel is that I get to hide behind them when things go wrong. But there’s no ability for me to grow so I must look elsewhere.

Subbuteo

I used to love Subbuteo. I never knew anyone who played it properly though. We always used to enjoy flicking the hell out of all our players until they’d vanished off the pitch while the ball travelled the grand total of two inches. But we’d be brilliant at goal kicks. Rather than using the dedicated goal kick figure (sold separately); we’d flick the green tail end of the keeper which would cause even more fouls and injured players. Naturally, this didn’t do our figures or fingernails any good; and we’d constantly be saving up our pocket money to buy a replacement team that wasn’t standing at a 45-degree angle. And this got us interested in the many accessories involved. I remember buying new goals with patterned nets, a plastic scoreboard with a billion team names that you cut out and fed into its slots, and the important silver Subbuteo F.A cup which was twice as tall as players. I’ve since read that (thankfully) the new pitch is a lot less itchy. Perhaps you don’t have to iron it as much.

Cultural Cow #dreamdiary 94

I’ve decided to take my mother to see a show in sunny Stratford-upon-Avon. We’ve ended up at this village hall with a bar. I order a glass of red wine for Mum and the barmaid reels out a list of suggestions for myself. I choose a pale ale. While I wait for my drink, I decide to explore the surroundings. It’s not a large hall and there’s only a small stage. It’s surrounded by tables and chairs rather than rows of seats. There’s not many people about and I suddenly wonder if we’re too early or whether the performance is taking place outside. We decide to venture out to investigate the latter. There’s a large freshly mown field and we round the corner to see what’s behind a clump of trees. There’s just more space that leads to a kissing gate, but as we return there’s a cow with horns approaching us. I manage to distract it around the side of the building while Mum makes her escape through the gate. I’m rescued by two cowboys in chequered shirts complete with hats and lassos dressed for the rodeo.

Heavy Duty

Our daily delivery usually arrives in great thick plastic black boxes. When there’s something inside it, you need both hands to lift it as they span over double your chest, and they weigh a tonne too. They’ve got grooves in them which are designed for stacking which is great when you’ve got a sack truck handy and they’re not loaded over the rim. But lifting one of those boxes on its own when there’s stuff inside is a real effort; and you wouldn’t want to carry it too far. If you dropped it from a height, the edge really would shatter and we’ve gone through a few of them that have become dangerous because of the way that they’ve broken. We used to have boxes which were half the size with fold-out handles on the top, and you could also use the handles as a base for stacking another one on top. But someone decided that there were too small and decided to retire them, and now we’re stuck with them.