Monday, 27 June 2016

Skank of the Week

So I arrive at this apartment building after scouting out the address on foot, and I just about manage to squeeze the van into a space without obstructing anyone. It wasn't a neat space but I wasn't planning on being there for very long. The whiff of draw is instant. I have 12 items including cutlery, an oven and a table and chairs set. I load up my sack trolley, wheel the goods up to the door and press the button on the intercom. The voice instantly replies, ‘Door’s open mate’.

‘Cheers, which floor are you on?’ But he’s gone. So I wheel everything in, all while trying to keep the door open and obstructing someone's exit in the process. In the corridor there is a door to a cluster of stairs, and through a set of double doors are, thankfully, two lifts and a printed list of floor and flat numbers. So I have to unload the trolley to get through the double doors, then when the lift arrives I give up on the trolley and hope it's still going to be there when I get back down. Inside the lift, the floors are evenly numbered, but I want floor 5. So I go up to floor 6, take everything out of the lift, then took one of the boxes downstairs to floor five, where, oddly, there is a lift. So I then cart the box back to floor six, throw everything back in the lift, then head back downstairs to the ground floor so that everything can be shoved into the other lift to go back up to floor five. Exhausted, I knock the door; and as a welcoming greeting for the efforts I am treated to; ‘I've got no broadband.‘

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