Pooping Around #dreamdiary 138

I need to poop. I’ve just used my membership to get into the local swimming baths which is shared with the adjacent school. I’ve visited both cubicles and both toilets have loo roll scattered around everywhere and someone has even wedged used toilet paper underneath the doors. I decide to try somewhere in the countryside instead. As I walk pass the school one of my old school friends recognises me and says hello. He works there as a teacher now. I head up into the countryside. A footpath takes me past a cottage with large windows and stone walls. There’s a low wooden gate that fastens in the middle. No-one’s around. I wonder if anyone is at home. I unlock the gate and creep up the driveway towards the porch. A series of barks makes me rush back to the gate, but instead of running away, I crouch underneath it and spot a woman looking out through the window. 

All Aboard!

Lunch was served inside of a large open house, but it was a shame that we didn’t have any wildlife to look at while we were dining. However, we did have time to walk around the lake before re-boarding our coach then we went a bit mad and bought panda hairbands and a cuddly toy panda dressed up as Captain America complete with shield. We travelled to Chongqing where we admired some amazing skyscrapers which slanted into the sky before boarding our boat which was to be our home for the next three nights. As well as a cruising deck, function room complete with bar and a full dining room, it also had a small downstairs gym. Our room was very smart and we even had a mini balcony to watch the world cruise by. We just had to make sure that the curtains were drawn at night as sometimes we’d wake up and we’d be moored directly alongside another boat!

Disappearing Act #vampress 8

Suddenly a huge boom emerged from the direction of the castle. They could hear bricks and mortar falling, and the ground began to shake as well. All they could do was to gaze up at the castle and hope that their loved ones would be OK. As night turned into day it grew extremely hot as if the land was being baked by the sun for the first time. There was no wind to blow away the mist and it took ages to vanish. When it did, both the castle and cliff were just not there. How could it be possible? These landmarks had stood above their village for generations. They ran up as close as they dared to the edge. As they looked over, all they saw was a small, pebbled beach with the remains of a turreted rooftile on it. Everything else was just water. They called for ropes so that the children could be lowered down to investigate. 

Pandamonium

We had to get an early start to our next destination before it filled up too quickly. At the sign of any panda, the Chinese go absolutely mental, and even with our taller status we still had to wait to get a decent view of these rare creatures. At one point a security guard would move the crowd on to give others a chance to see what was happening. It was a bit annoying to see them sit there obliterated or just stuffing their faces. Sometimes we’d spot them in the trees and it’s quite amazing how high they can climb. They sometimes need help coming down though. Inside the enclosures, not much was happening other than more eating. At least the teenage pandas looked a bit more awake. My favourite were the red pandas because they were a lot more active and put on a bit of an acrobat show despite being the size of a raccoon.

There are Limits

So the train drivers are going on strike again. Well, who can blame them? After all, everything’s going up to try and pull more cash, so it’s only natural that they should try and get a raise too to keep up. The problem is that it also affects the little man. We’ve already seen major train cancellations because of a shortage of drivers. But when the little man can’t get about because he can’t afford his bills, it’s just not fair, especially when train drivers are on a huge wage anyway. When is it the little man’s turn to strike? When can he stop getting pushed around and demand his right to meet his bills? If we don’t stop operate greed now, it’ll just go on and on until everyone is rioting against everyone. There’s only so much that everyone else can take, and at some point people will just turn on each other. 

A Chevy Around Chengdu

The next morning, we took one last look around Guilin by checking out a small boat made of stone that overhung the river. Then we boarded our plane to Chengdu. Once we’d arrived we had just enough time to get a bite to eat from a bustling food market. All the buildings were lit up with Chinese lanterns hanging everywhere. I bravely chose a squid kebab deep fried in chili sauce, but my mother of all places went to the local chicken burger shop. Then we were whisked off to the theatre to see a shadow puppet show. The auditorium was lavishly decorated and we had complimentary tea brought to our table. As well as a band and costumed performers, the puppeteers had a variety of colourful masks, some of which breathed and even wore fire! They weren’t afraid to pop up in front of the crowd to make a grand entrance either.

"You have to fight to reach your dream. You have to sacrifice and work hard for it."

-Lionel Messi.

Sometimes it feels that you can’t live an everyday life if you want to get ahead. You must put the effort in, and sometimes you have to try and ignore the distractions around you, even if it means putting yourself first and being ignorant of others. You have to give up certain things that others take for granted so that you can create the time to put your plans in motion. You might also have to behave in a manner that society expects otherwise of you. There’s going to be some long, hard nights ahead with a lot of planning involved to achieve your goal and you’d rather just lay down your head and sleep. You might also have to face punishment before accomplishment. But if you think that it’s worth it and it’s what you want, then go ahead and put the effort in and do it. Hopefully, you’ll reap the reward that you want. 

Guilin Gang

One thing that I just had to do before leaving was to climb up and sit on top of a giant stone elephant. Luckily there was no one around to say no or throw us out. They probably thought that the statue would be too big for a Chinese person. That night we waded through the market and observed vendors selling scorpions, crabs and beetles in gigantic red plastic bowls. Then we hit a bar which felt just like the western world until you went out the back where there were still squattiees only. One of the best sights was one of the large hotels. We’d gather outside this glass fronted building staring past the fountain into the restaurant within. Then water would run down the whole side of the whole hotel as a waterfall which would be lit up and played to music. It was the Chinese version of a Las Vegas hotel.

What is the most panic-inducing thing that can happen as a Teenager?

Fearing everything. Being trapped with no way out because you’re going to fail everything you attempt. Feeling lost because there’s no-one out there to help you change things. Getting hysterical about it and hiding yourself away from the world. Feeling so trapped that you don’t want to get out of bed to face the day. Watching others succeed while you’re constantly placed at the bottom of the pile. Being betrayed by those who you once thought were your friends. Not having enough courage or knowledge to stand up and ask for help. Anything that can force you to worry about the future and getting trapped while being targeted as a source of frustration. Not being taken seriously and constantly being pitched as a joke or a subject of mockery without any form of support. But at some point you have to stand up to it and fight your way out. 

Elephant Hill

Once we’d got back to the hotel, we had some brief time on our hands. We decided to head into town where we saw two girls mashing nought in brightly coloured clothes to make confectionary. We drifted through a square and away from the city to Elephant Hill. This was supposedly a cliff with a face in the shape of an elephant but it was very difficult to see it. Like many of China’s city spaces, you had to pay an admission charge to go in. As it was nearing closing time we knew that we weren’t getting value for money, but when were we going to be here again? While the cliff was imaginative, the rest of the site was lovely for walking. There was a lake and it was laid out like a seaside resort with boats for hire, paved walkways and temples to explore. As well as a wine cellar, there were also tunnels carved into the cliffs that I just had to check out.

FMK Smartwatch

I bought this smartwatch for my mother. I found it very easy to set up and sync with her phone. She was very impressed by the bold display and by the strap as it looks like a dress watch rather than a silicone-type sports watch like other smartwatches, but a spare strap is included if you prefer this. The strap was easy to fit once we'd found a video on YouTube, and she enjoys telling everyone how many steps she's done each day as well as monitoring her blood pressure and sleep patterns. The screen has a nice bold display and you can easily customise it by adding a picture from your smartphone. It's not a named brand watch, but it's packed with lots of other features that you wouldn't expect of a branded watch at the same price. The big question is whether you’ll use them all and if they’ll work. 

The Green Zone

Once we’d been served out first refreshments, we climbed to the top deck for a more entertaining view. The hills were naturally curved like giant camel humps with blotches of green hair on them. I half expected to see a blue hedgehog running up and down them. Along the way, we got a snapshot of a life that we’d never think of. A fisherman had built a raft solely out of bamboo canes and was using nothing more than a garden trimmer to power it as an engine. We passed pagodas and lighthouses and people walking their dogs on quiet pebble beaches while buffalo grazed in the distance. Back downstairs, our meal was about to be served. It was typical Chinese noodles but it may as well have been airplane food bought from a dodgy Chinese takeaway. At least we had comfortable seats to enjoy the rest of the voyage in.

Interesting Topics

The weather. It’s something that we all talk about to complete strangers. It’s a safe topic. You can expect a boring, droll response and you probably won’t cause offence to anyone with your answer. But what else can pass as a conversation with complete strangers? Offence is the last thing that you want to cause them; yet you don’t want to be boring enough to prompt a conversation that they’ve heard ten times already. What’s a good opening line that you can open with that stranger on the train? If they’re reading a book, they may not to be disturbed. They might be a bit shy in responding themselves which could make things even more awkward. But you need to have something ready so that it looks like you’re not judging or ogling them. If you’re a private person, it could be difficult to find some common ground. You might have to ask something that makes you look completely stupid on comment on something that’s just plain obvious. 

A Break from the Guide

Before we turned in for the night, we learnt a bit more about our guide who wandered back from his evening off. He decided to join us and we buy him a drink. He tells us that he doesn’t usually do this tour but he’s covering for someone, and he’s due to re-marry when he returns home. The next day we’re joined by Australians at the breakfast table. They’re very proud people and they’ve even bought a miniature version of the Ashes to rub their latest triumph into British people but not being into cricket I don’t really care and their joke just seems novel and sad. We’re then transported to a harbour for a boat trip down the Lijang river. We’ve been advised to take some nibbles but we will be served hot drinks and a basic lunch. We set off on our two-storey boat amongst all the other tourists and it looks like there’s a race to the finish. We’re surrounded by hundreds of other boats all attempting the same route.

Press Play

This film has an interesting concept, but it’s a bit outdated in today’s society. It’s one of those films that you can have playing in the background and don’t really have to concentrate on, but you do have to do some thinking about what you see. It’s also strange how Harrison retains these memories. It’s not clear why the tape wouldn’t rewind or why the tape stopped after each song. Surely he must encounter a regular Laura in the intermission between each song. After the first death a crossing is installed but there could have been a bit more effort to include it in the film, at least with a memorial plaque in front of it. It’s also not clear what the blacked-out painting on the wall represents even after we know the cause of death, and it’s a shame that we’re not referred back to the image on Laura’s phone once it’s been discovered. But considering it’s a film based on music, I don’t recognise many of the songs.

Black Hawk Down by Mark Bowden

Black Hawk Down: A Story of Modern War by Mark Bowden
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This was a fast-flowing account with views from many perspectives. So many in fact, that as a final work it was to focus on which characters were constant and which were new since there were that many. It seemed odd that each character required an in-depth background which often got in the way of telling the narrative and describing the action. It was great however, that so much detail was put into the gathering of perspectives to create the story, including opinions from both sides as well as those who served as support staff. It was often hard to tell if a new incident had occurred or whether the same one was being reflected on. Explanations on what was planned to happen was fantastic, which makes it more complex when attempting to explain what exactly went wrong, although an easier perspective would be that the enemy was more geared up than was first thought. Nevertheless, this is an interesting perspective on how things can change in a war situation.

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The Outed #dreamdiary 137

I’m sitting in the back room of a pub. The tables have been pushed into a square to give the impression that it’s a conference room. We’re trying to organise an event and I’ve formed a new team to take over the running of it. I’ve given them free reign of what can be achieved but there are some restrictions to protect the organisation’s budget. I’ve come to them with a new proposal of what we’d like to happen during the event. There’s some rustling of papers and whispering amongst a group of four people sitting together in the corner. After a consultation where there’s an element of confusion, I’m asked to leave the room for a moment. I approach the bar where there’s a limited choice of handpumps available. Instead, there’s a series of metallic words mounted on wooden plaques with a pipe at the end of the ‘S’ to dispense the beverage. 

Gliding Around Guilin

 There were Chinese lanterns lit up in the air and historic buildings with wooden reinforced gated doors with a bungalow on top which had a pagoda stuck on it. We had absolutely no idea what it was but it looked impressive. There were glass houses lit up over ornate bridges and tunnelled planted walkways in the shape of hearts. Once we’d finished our circuit, we arrived at Miss Xu’s pub. This was a very small establishment run by a Chinese boy and some of our group was already there. Conversation was a bit difficult owing to the language barrier but he was smart enough to have an app on his phone. In between serving customers he played his guitar to entertain us. It was a good night to start with, but one lady got a bit carried away when she kept talking about the motorcyclists not wearing a helmet just because it wasn’t cool, and kept offering to buy the waiter one.

What Sound does a Hamster Make?

I’ve never in my life known a hamster to squeak. They might have squeaked when they get alarmed or when they’re in need of help. Even when they’re eating out of my hand or having a nibble out of the bowl, they’re usually quite silent. Sometimes I did have to wake them to make sure that they were still OK or that they hadn’t escaped. The two noises that I associate with them was the turning of the wheel at odd times in the night and gnawing on the cage bars, which was either to trim their teeth or an attempt to gnaw through and escape. Maybe their teeth were too big to allow them to physically squeak. The only thing that I can think of was that I had my ears full of wax at the time, which was most of my life during my childhood. Either that or I was a very good hamster owner. 

Blackpool on the Water

We fancied a break from Chinese food and got wind that there was an Irish bar in town, but first we decided to go for a stroll around the neighbourhood. A pleasant pathway wound its way through ancient trees offering scenic glimpses of the rivers and canals. The bannisters make it look like it’s something out of Labyrinth. At night there’s even mood lighting. At one time I felt like I was in Amsterdam with all the neon lights and boats cruising past. I even found a genuine lock, though it was much more controlled with a harbourmaster monitoring the doors rather than a sweaty man with a lock. We did have the chance to go on a boat, but we’d be spending most of the next day on one so we decided to miss it. Instead, we encountered local dance classes, ornate bridges and local bands all out on the water.

Friendly Neighbourhood Superhero

He’s small in stature but big in heart. Friendly and outgoing to everyone, he has a small skinny frame with a cute black fringe on his forehead. He’s always stylish by wearing simple clothes, usually jeans, a plain t-shirt and a light jacket, and has nothing to hide, apart from erring a lot and using a lower pitched voice. He knows what he’s about and rarely lacks confidence in his abilities. He always finds something fun to add to the conversation, and he’s never afraid to expand his knowledge. It’s even funnier when he forgets himself, and he’s not one to handle his liquor. That’s the only time that he causes a commotion, though it’s easily handled with a bit of talk. He’s gone from nerd to a full-on father without having to make any great change about himself. He’s a true superhero for achieving all he has. You’ve got to wonder how he’s done it. 

Pursuing Paddy's Fields

We drove through well-maintained roads and passed through tunnels underneath huge mountains before arriving in the valley. Above the car park were beautiful timber buildings with ornate windows which I believed were hotel rooms. We followed a small road alongside the hill, sometimes giving way to quad bikes ferrying the less abled up and down. Occasionally the odd outhouse opened out as a souvenir shop. From a distance, it all looked so natural and it was very hard to make out the fences of human occupation. I wonder if the valley would have been greener if the hills hadn’t been touched. We could just make out one sole woman working in the hills. I was disappointed that she wasn’t wearing a lampshade styled hat. Perhaps the nature of the hillside needed very little maintenance or maybe the rest of the staff were in the kitchen cooking our lunch. It was very good grub though.

 

Pressing Matters #vampress 7

One man remained standing in the darkness. He called out but no-one replied. Suddenly, two glowing red dots appeared just in front of his head. He had no idea how long they’d been there, he only noticed them in the distance as he spun around in an attempt to find his fellow villagers. Should he approach them of back away? He reached up to see if he could feel any heat off them but brushed something soft. The orbs started to rise higher in the darkness. He felt a thump as they disappeared out of sight. He then felt something soft and heavy being pressed against his head. Outside the castle, the women could also feel the castle grounds shaking. Normally, there would be a frigid wind blowing the land, but tonight there was an unexplained mist. If it was light enough, they might have been able to see stone falling off the clifftops. 

Bang a Drum

Owing to an early start, we had the afternoon to ourselves. Opposite the hotel was a shopping complex complete with a karaoke bar and private recording studio party rooms, but it was a bit too early to patronise these premises. Instead we did something unspeakable in a foreign country and used their public transit system. I don’t speak Chinese, but armed with a map I just had to match the right letters to the right place and we were at our destination in just three stops with one change. We even managed to figure out that our water had to be screened through an x-ray machine before boarding. Our destination was a drum tower. On every side was a huge drum which functioned as the city’s warning system while inside sat a large banqueting hall for the town’s officials. We got a sneaky maw in while nobody was looking. It would certainly be a sight if these were played.

Making Things From Street Corners

It’s great when you can make things out of bits lying around you. You’ve managed to create something purposeful from what have normally been chucked in a skip and it hasn’t cost you a thing! It’s one reason why I’m reluctant to throw things away as you never know when it’s going to be useful. But on the other hand, is going to be more of a hinderance if you do keep it, especially if you lack the skills necessary to create your goal? You’ve also got to be lucky enough or knowledgeable enough to source the materials, and if you want it done in a hurry you may have to purchase some of the materials anyway. But if you’re patient enough, good things will come to you. And of course, it might even work the other way if you choose to donate materials or parts to someone else. They might even give you something in return.

Gnome Factory

 There were huge hangers to explore to marvel at these life-sized statues. It makes you wonder what disaster or conspiracy happened here to force these masterpieces to be buried. It was great to see archaeologists at work wrapping up artefacts for transportation and observing the dig, though it’s a shame that you weren’t allowed to get closer or walk amongst them. After all, they were discovered nearly fifty years ago. I did begin to think if this was a conspiracy and there was another hanger somewhere with a kiln waiting to fire up a fresh batch that would be put into the larger hangers to set and that the old ones would be put into the gift shop. After all, we were in a country known for its manufacturing. You also had a choice of toilets here, western or Chinese-style, or squatties or potties as we liked to call them.

"Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away”.

-Will Smith.

Coming from someone who’s always thought of as a player, this does sound like a bit of a dull boy’s life. As well as quite surprising, it’s also a bit boring. You can’t even keep birthday secrets or jest around with your mates. There’s also a bit of a literal double meaning to make the message even more truthful. If you want to cheat death, you may even have to love a bit of a shielded life with no fun or risk at all, which means that there’s going to be very little to enthral you. Some of these actions are quite hard to achieve, and it may even be impossible for some. But if you do achieve them then you know that you are loved and you love in return. But bear in mind that you’re unlikely to cheat death if you find something that’s going to take your breath away.

Driving in the Wall

Our coach literally drove through the giant gates into the city walls. The archway towered thirty feet in front of us and on the top of it was a huge pagoda. Chinese lanterns hung from banner poles attached to the walkway in front of us. The wall itself it a three-square mile structure and it would take about four hours to walk its whole circumference. But it’s wider than an English country road and you can even hire bikes to explore its entirety if you wish. On its outside is modern Xi’an, and t times it feels that you’re in the middle of a traffic roundabout. There’s modern block buildings but alongside these are towers with pagodas on top to remind you that you’re still in China. But if you look into the distance, you can see rivers and trees and it doesn’t feel like you’re in a city at all.

Are the Police in the UK Friendly?

They used to be. There’s a classic image of a bobby strolling his beat or standing on a street corner and he’d be happy to tell you the time, give directions, stop traffic so you could cross the road or help in any way that he could as a civil servant. Nowadays, if you can’t help him by pointing out where the CCTV footage is then he’s more likely to push you out of the way or drive around you at a roundabout so that he can get to his destination quicker. He’s a rare sight on the street and usually he's only there if he’s investigating a report. He certainly doesn’t like to be distracted or be stopped for a chat unless he’s in a group. I don’t blame him in a way. I suppose that cutbacks mean that there’s less police on the streets so they have to stretch themselves.

Piecing the Past Together

Fresh out of Beijing, we land outside Xi’an and within minutes we’re whisked away on a coach to a museum just outside the city. This museum is a recent discovery as it contains miniature versions of the Terracotta Warriors, almost toy-like. We enter a giant pyramid and gather around a display case where the era is set and get a brief glimpse of the area’s history. Around eighty pits have been discovered which have been split into three large sections. We descend a dark tunnel to examine the first of the pits which contains some pottery. It’s dimly lit to preserve the area, and we walk through contained tunnels so as not to disturb the atmosphere, but the glass doesn’t make taking photographs easy. There are substantial numbers of child dolls, cows and pigs, and what could be urns with stoppers shaped like the head and body of people. There’s also models of horses with carriages in various scales and some are painted, although these could be for reconstruction purposes rather than being the actual discovery.  

 

Holding

You won’t find any glamourous people in this series. Instead, you get a sense of a small community that has been worn down because of each other’s actions. The local constable might be incompetent which others rely on, but he does recognise what’s best for the community and when a job needs to be completed right. There’s a bit of confusion over the plot as it’s not clear whether it actually occurred and who the love child was. It’s always complicated in small communities with same-sex relationships as everyone assumes otherwise and it’s hard to keep up who’s with who, especially with the jumper act at the talent show. The actors work hard to keep their characters in check, but there needs to be more conflict to make this interesting. I think it needed a bit more humour to keep people interested and a bit more clarification in its conclusions.