Make George Great again

It’s a terrible shame that we English aren’t able to celebrate our patron saint. The Irish people have a huge celebration around the world for St. Patrick’s Day, while St. David’s and Andrew’s are made bank holidays in Wales and Scotland respectively. And yet here in England we are expected to treat St. George’s Day as normal without any patriotism or celebration. They probably celebrate it a lot more overseas. It’s just another way of how other cultures have demanded that we follow their ways and serve their needs once again. Well, it’s about time we stood up to this and ensure that we’re allowed to celebrate our history with battle re-enactments and pubs running festivals to raise a glass in aid of St. George. Let’s get Morris dancers back out on the streets again and each town should have its own carnival to celebrate its community. Let’s get this country to be great again.

The search for a new curry house

I used to really enjoy a good curry at the local restaurant, but ever since they’ve served me undercooked lamb I’ve been very put off in going there. They serve an excellent dish in a barbecue-like sauce, but not too spicy. The strange thing is that it always came on a skillet that was absolutely loaded with sauce; which made it very awkward to add rice without making a mess. On the same evening, my aunt ordered a sheik kebab, but that too looked undercooked. I was ill shortly afterwards, but it could have been the lamb, the dodgy beer I ordered at the next bar or a combination of the two combined with the virus that was circulating around at the time. It’s definitely put me off visiting either venue again; and the last time I went for a curry I ordered the Bombay chicken which was a bit stodgy and too much thick sauce. So the struggle continues.

A Modern Utopia by H.G Wells

A Modern Utopia by H.G. Wells
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

H.G Wells wrote many tales of adventure and exploration, which were fascinating to early twentieth century readers as transportation to faraway lands was so difficult back then. The story begins with speculation of the author’s present expectations rather than a journey of discovery, as if the author preventing the reader from drawing their own conclusions. Wells does lose his reader in this manner as he tries to make comparisons and draw conclusions too early in the novel. However, the establishment of an upper-class Samurai kills off the idea of utopia straight away, as it proves that some people have more status than others. There is also the conception that some men are doomed to failure; and others are allowed to be more free than others. The conversation that he shares when meeting himself is very brief and uninspiring, whereas this could in other situations arise conflict and an exciting escape from Utopia, but sadly Wells just goes back to his observations. At least their transportation system has been thought through a bit more and is more civilised and relaxing.

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How to make a million

‘If you had a million pounds you could live off the interest alone’. I've been toying with a rag to riches story where a man walks into a bank and asks for a loan of exactly that. The story would be some kind of con scheme where he’d live off credit and reputation alone without paying a penny. This might have worked if it’s set in the early twentieth century; but that may be more research than its worth and the modern day man may not relate to it. In today’s terms, it's too unrealistic. For starters, you would be receiving less than £10,000 a year as you would inevitably have to spend some money to survive before your first interest is due. And then there's the cost of how long the loan is for; and the repayments to pay it back. But now that I think about it; the final result could actually be a rom-com rather than a con or a grand sell of everything he owes. I just like the idea of someone walking into a bank and asking for a million. 

Man verses Machine

It’s coming. The battle to end all battles. Everywhere you go; any process thought possible is becoming automated. We now have automated checkouts; and automated cars if Google get its way. We’ll therefore have machines which are built by machines and are driven by machines. But will we be driven inside the machines; or driven out of existence at that point? Because if machines are doing everything, then how is the common man supposed to make a living wage? Will we be forced to live on the picket line fighting for survival? Will the lawyers be replaced by faceless robots in shirts administering our rights and wrongs and exterminating us accordingly? Or will we live in harmony without the need for trade with our needs managed by one autonomous system? And that’ll be a battle between the machines themselves; to determine who is solely in charge for once and for all.

Dombey and Son by Charles Dickens

Dombey And Son by Charles Dickens
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This is the classic Victorian novel, where greed of the upper classes leads to the family’s downfall. It’s a just deserts kind of feeling where Mr. Dombey’s neglect of his daughter punishes his social status. The strive of Dombey’s business self always dominates over his emotional needs as he runs his family in a similar manner to his occupation; to ensure the survival of the fittest. Little Paul’s inquisitive innocence puts the grown-ups in charge of him to display their true colours as they are put under pressure to answer this honest child. Dickens is also keen to illustrate the role of women in society and the lack of independence that they have; and that their only role is to be comforters. This is conveyed perfectly through Florence. But Florence is the true heroine; bravely stepping forward to save her father despite his harsh treatment of her. It’s a great book with some great comic moments when the innocent are able to mock those in authority.

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Spring Pint Taken EditorAle

We’d like to apologise to our readers as this issue is out a little later than usual. Like many of CAMRA’s campaigns, activities and beer festivals; Pint Taken is produced by an active team of volunteer CAMRA members; some of which are balancing a number of hats to ensure the continuing success of the campaign. It’s important for new volunteers to come forward and offer their services. So why not pop along to your next branch meeting and see how you can help out?

People have often wondered of the importance of the beer tax campaign. A penny off a pint may not sound like much in this day and age; and often it’s not seen at the bar in full view of the customer. This year, we’re even less likely to see a reduction owing to the increasing costs in labour owing to the new living wage. But it’s the fact that we’re putting a halt on any previous increase in duty which would see costs for the beer industry rise even further. It’s also important to demonstrate that the UK still has one of the highest rates on beer tax in Europe; and bring this crippling fact to the attention of our politicians. So please do your bit to help preserve our pub heritage by writing to your MP today.  

And now that the sun is shining and the days are getting warmer and longer; it’s time to Spring out there and seek out the best beers that our pubs have to offer. Cheers!

Traffic Trauma on the M40

I was unlucky enough to be caught in two sets of traffic jams last week. Both were on the M40 on the exact same spot between the southbound Gaydon and Banbury junctions. The first time round, it was due to an overturned ambulance that had somehow skidded off the hard shoulder and had overturned in the verge. This wasn’t much of a jam, but many people were slowing down to look at it which obviously slowed traffic down during rush hour. I had a delivery back up near Leamington; and as I headed back northbound, I saw that traffic had been cleared and that normal service had resumed. So the natural route was to return to the motorway for my final delivery back in Banbury. And this time the trouble really did hit. He had ambulances, fire engines and police all tearing down the hard shoulder to attend to the scene of a car rear-ending a lorry; while everyone was frantically trying to tune into their radios to find out what was happening. Then came the scrum; as everyone was trying to get into the right-hand lane so that we could all get pass. A whole hour lost. And we still don't know much about it; apparently accidents are so common on the motorways that it really is hard to find out any information about one specific incident.

Channel 4's Four in a Bed

This must be the ultimate bitch programme. It’s the professionals criticising then are outed as hypocrites as soon as it’s their turn to host; some of which are very laughable for the facilities that they offer compared to their manner of judges. Also, a lot of it is staged for the effect of seeking criticism; if you watch the episodes of the areas that you know; you can clearly see that people are driving in the wrong direction; and that visitors seem to be chauffeured whereas it’s just for the effect so that both people can be captured in the same spot. I wonder how it affects people’s business as they’re obviously trying to promote their hotels; yet for the ones that failed; it could be disastrous. Next week, I’m off to a B&B. But I’m not going to tear the room apart just to look for dust. But I will have the freedom to judge like hell without being judged in return. 

I smashed up Smosh

Another app bites the dust. Last night, I deleted Smosh Food Battle from my gaming list. I’d completed the platform on all three difficulties; and was working my up to upgrade all weapons and; more importantly; evolve my pet. I managed to get a weapons pet about a quarter of the way then one day I forgot to feed it and it died; forcing me to buy another. This second pet was much rarer; and this time I got it levelled up to a third of the way; but it then turned out that I was giving it the wrong food; so it too died. In my last attempt, I decided to start the game from scratch to devote the right resources to the right upgrades; and though my first pet was very common; things were going well. Until last night; my pet wouldn’t even show itself on-screen with its special abilities. So rather than waste time trying to figure out the game’s bug; I decided to quit and get out. So goodbye Smosh.

Waddle it be at the Woodman, Birmingham

Our epic pub crawl concluded at the Woodman in Birmingham. For some reason my Brummie friends decided that a taxi would be the best way to get there; but because of the match day traffic I thought that it wouldn't make much difference. We arrived at the pub and the first beer I chose was a pale ale from the dancing Duck brewery; Waddle It Be? It was a great name and a great beer; but the next thing on our agenda was food. The pub had drawn up a Burns night menu; which was launched just for us as part of the crawl. I ordered the haggis burger; while everyone else was contempt with the haggis, neeps and tatties. This caused for another pint; so I tried the new local pale ale from the Indian Brewing company; which was kept well but wasn’t anything special. We were then invited to dine in the upstairs room; the food was very nice apart from the hair which I found but decided to carry on munching as I kind of knew the chef and so decided to give him a chance. My final pint to wash it all away with was an Unweal Stout; which had lots of oatmeal flavours. I was treated to this by a visiting landlord; who also chose to shower our table with pork pies and packs of crisps. I left with the local pubs officer who offered to direct me to the train station. All in all, it was a good day out.

Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer

Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

Eoin Colfer tries a teenage attempt of a Terry Pratchett novel with plenty of apathy towards his characters. Any hint of sympathy is automatically put on hold by a plot device; so we never truly learn what the characters are thinking; even though there’s plenty of situations when the characters are alone. How a teenager is supposed to sympathise with a teenage millionaire with a highly trained guerrilla butler; I’ve no idea. And then we have the fairies. A society that has decided to live in exile for fear of being discovered; but armed to the teeth with the latest technology; yet the only magic that they are capable of performing is for healing purposes. There are some creatures with very odd abilities; but these only seem to litter the storyline with toilet humour. We also have confusing plot devices; if the fairies have successfully stopped time then why is time allowed to continue on a video feed? It’s all very confusing with a weak conclusion which is way too simple.

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Redditch Winter Ale Festival 2016

Awesome! Lovely stuff! Great Ale! These were just some of the comments that Redditch and Bromsgrove CAMRA received about the 9^th Redditch Winter Ale Festival 2016. The event, which was held in early February at the Rocklands Social Club in Reddith, showcased 33 real ales alongside a selection of cider and perry, and attracted people from as far as Glasgow! As well as producing a Breakfast Stout at 7% which was one of the favourite ales on offer, festival sponsors Ambridge (based in Inkberrow) also brewed a special Indian pale ale to commemorate the festival’s chosen charity; Troop Aid. Blackheath-based brewers and sponsors Fixed Wheel were voted as third favourites with their Blackheath Stout; with the overall winner being Sarah

Hughes in Sedgley with their Dark Ruby Mild. Striking the chords on stage Friday night were Bromsgrove based band Cadence, who entertained drinkers with their harmonic acoustics. On Saturday evening, visitors were treated to husband and wife duo Mark and Kathy Collinson, with a supporting act by Gary, Jim and Jim. Membership Secretary Doug Robinson was kept busy throughout the festival and signed up over thirty members to the campaign, with 23 people alone coming from the Redditch area. Cider drinkers saw Double Vision from Boughton Monchelsea in Kent as their top tipple, and the festival also raised over £300 for Troop Aid who support sick and injured troops. Festival organiser Paul Richards said: ‘We’d like to thank everyone who came along to support us this year; it was great fun and there was a great choice of beers, cider and perry on offer.’

Hobsons Best Bitter at the Robin Hood, Drayton

Hidden away between the villages of Belbroughton and Chaddesley Corbett lies the Robin Hood at Drayton, a rural pub with a lot to offer. Their well-kept real ales have caught the attention of Redditch and Bromsgrove CAMRA, who have decided to commend the pub as their Autumn Pub of the Season. There has been a pub on the site since 1825 and the lounge itself has mostly been unaltered to create a cosy retreat for drinkers. The bar has been extended into the original storeroom to create a restaurant. Chef Kerry Wynn serves traditional pub food alongside Trina Jelfs, while cellar man Jon Roberts (pictured left) is in charge of the bar. Jon says that the Enville ales that he stocks are very popular; and there’d be a riot if those beers were to change! He also offers Hobsons Best Bitter, Holden’s Golden Glow, and two beers from Wye Valley; all of which are well worth sampling. 

Tribute to Simon Vickers

Simon Vickers was a true trooper. During his early involvement, he looked after the health and safety aspects of the beer festival; ensuring that the equipment that we used was properly documented. As a local member, he strode to make improvements within the committee despite some attendance problems. He was also a dedicated member of the Worcestershire Wildlife Trust, and acted as a warden helping to maintain the site and act as a guide. We were once fortunate enough to be given a tour of the ferns and wildlife; which concluded in the bird hide where we were able to observe all sorts of wild fowl. We knew that he was diagnosed with something, but he preferred not to talk about and slowly drifted away. In his later years, he became a hermit under pressure of divorce, and stayed away from the crowd. My thoughts go out to his family.

Something's been bugging me...

I’ve had a winter bug for quite a while now. I’ve been sick at work which actually caused me to take to bed the following day then cancel work the day after. It also left my uniform and shoes with an interesting smell; not to mention the smell left in the bathroom. Two weeks later, after a large meal, it happened again. Luckily, I managed to sort myself out in time. Then again in a pub after another fortnight (that one wasn’t so clean). But I’ve had this stomach bug for quite a while now. At best, I feel a bit dizzy or nauseous, and my farts tend to be a bit more powerful and smell more. Trouble is, there’s no real access to medical care. All the doctors will only work during daytime hours; getting an appointment means that you have to spend an archaic time on the phone against a load of old grannies. Where’s the priority for the working man?

Fyne Ales Jarl at Craven Arms, Birmingham

This pub is fairly new on the real ale scene, but has a good local following. Formerly owned by Holden's, it is now run by Black Country Ales who have done a superb job of preserving the exterior tiles and lights. Its square lounge allows for many tables, each with its own view of the bar and it's beer blackboard which changes constantly. The good news is that beer shifts here and is kept well. The bad news is that the cost is slightly more expensive; a half pint of a stronger beer can cost up to £2.50. Each hand pump also has tasting notes to help you make the big decision.  I sampled Jarl from the Fyne Brewery in Scotland which had a strong taste despite its low gravity; with my very own Nessie. It's a perfect pub for meeting for a chat with friends. I also tried the Weird Beard Black Perle; a superb milk coffee stout.

Middlemarch by George Eliot

Middlemarch by George Eliot
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Eliot’s novel perfectly illustrates nineteenth century values of life in the provinces; the disvalue of education and politics, the need to find hobbies for the idle, the fear of women meddling in the affairs of men. Learned men remain as professional as possible; even making marriage proposals in the form a letter; which justifies Dorothea’s need to seek an alternative lover. Gossip is king as always; demonstrated by Mrs Cadwallader who likes to remain in political circles for this very reason. The arrival of Lydgate is the instant talk of the town owing to his being eye candy by the female characters. His association with Mr. Bulstrode is a remarkable commentary on the nineteenth century healthcare system and Eliot’s efforts to improve it. The fact that Lydgate remains a bachelor creates much suspense within the novel; since he would be the preferable lover for Dorothea. However, Dorothea’s needs are for power and influence and is a form of escapism for her provincial life.

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Star Wars: The Force (re) Awakens

I finally got around to seeing the new Star Wars film. I was surprised to see that there were a fair few people in the cinema watching it considering it had been out a fair while. That said, the film truly is a sellout to Disney. It’s just coincidence that Ren steals the Millennium Falcon; which is just coincidence that it’s salvaged by Hans Solo and Chewbacca. But why didn't the First Order simply turn on the force field when Finn and Ren escape the Star Destroyer?Once again, there's a bloody big spaceship for the rebels to blow up which has a very similar weakness to the point that you may as well name it Death Star III.  The producers probably made a good decision to write an exit plot for Hans, he probably wouldn't survive another two films. And the supreme master just seems to be a gigantic version of Lord Voldemort . I think the only novel thing that made it enjoyable is the obese robot that rolls around everywhere. I bet R2 made him. 

The Scarlett Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne

The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

After Hawthorne’s overindulging introduction to his background in the Custom House, we jump straight into a third person narrative to learn of Hester Prynne and her sin in early seventeenth century American society. As there is so much contempt for her at the beginning of the novel, her resolve to stay within the community shows just how duty-bound she feels to continue to reside in New England rather than to have confidence and start life afresh. It’s a shame that the narrative isn't done in the third person; but then again that is what makes it so readable in comparison to other novels at that time. But there are times when Hawthorne wants to be more exotic in his descriptions; yet the societal values at the time prevents him from doing so in order for the story to be published. The conclusion must be the most pleasing as we gain a sense that justice has been served, but there is very little portrayal of emotion from Hester.

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Smokin

So today's my first morning back at work after a week away sorting out the festival. We've had a new alarm system installed; and I've been told that I didn't need to do anything about the backdoor and got a new identity tag and some instructions. I didn't get to lock the store that evening as the delivery team arrived just as we were leaving. So today was the first time I got to use it. We got in ok and did the usual preparations, then I went to open the backdoor in preparation for our van checks. All of a sudden, alarms start to sound which is contrary to what I've been told. It turns out that the goods in door is now connected to the smoke cloak; which has started spraying at the other end of the shop. At the same time, the fire alarm started which overrode the electrical supply to the door. After making contact with a few managers I eventually got hold of a helpline which told me that they no longer support my store. I gave up, sent someone out through the fire escape to release the doors from the outside, then waited for the smoke to clear. We gave up on the backdoor; so brought everything through to the front. Amazingly, we only departed twenty minutes late. 

Dream Diary 5

Tonight I was on holiday somewhere hot with my mum. No father, no one else, just us in a small town with a blue sky and an old church. Nowhere exotic, just somewhere Mediterranean, but they did make a lot of rugs. I was still in the same job as I was constantly on the phone booking days off, but it was very peaceful and we were just walking through the resort together talking about how many rugs we could see. We’d just seen how they were made, and we were looking at just how many rug vendors there were and spotting the people that had bought them. We also discussed goat milk production and who did it the old fashioned way, and who had a milking machine. Bizarrely, the man who runs the local petrol station had one. We also walked through someone's garage which had a red fire fiesta parked in it, and I also rolled down a hill full of rugs on my belly without anyone commenting.  I suppose it's my current future if things don't change. Not a bad future though.

Like a Boss

I’ve been watching Undercover Boss for a fair while now. Just how thick are some of these people? Obviously, people are going to see it; including colleagues as it’s promoting their business within the public domain. But the amount of corporate strategies that they abandon clearly shows that these individuals have no sense of corporate teamwork. Another thing is that all of the colleagues seem to be always involved with a medical battle fighting cancer. But I think that the strangest one of all goes to Gigi’s Cupcakes, with the CEO’s remarkable sexist comments about needing a man to do the heavy lifting. This comes from a hypocritical single mother who has abandoned all family ties (though she does learn from the experience of others during her time undercover so it does show that sometimes the boss has to change too). It’s amazing to see how they struggle in the most menial jobs; which causes them to invest towards the end of the programme.   

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

After going into a high street bookshop and asking which book by Jane Eyre would I like to order, I gave up and ordered it on-line. It’s a tale of a naïve orphaned girl who wishes to remain in her cocoon but is forced into boarding school by her aunt. Here we witness her rebellious spirit turn into a questioning one; not for educational purposes but to learn more about the world around her. When she leaves school and enters the servitude of Mr. Rochester, she is almost shy and becomes totally obedient to the events placed around her, with her rebellious spirit gone forever. This is why Mr. Rochester’s manner easily confuses her and is able to keep his secrets from her very easily; from hiding his identify to his mad wife in the attic. But the best thing about Jane Eyre is that it’s a book of action; unlike other Victorian novels where the plot is merely of the gossip of others; Bronte actually creates novel experiences for her characters to react to.

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Meeting the Top Beer Crew

I’ve met the Top Beer Crew! On our tour through Birmingham, I was introduced to Kevin and his team who make films about beer! We met in the Post Office Vaults where I enjoyed a golden ale called Autopilot from the Wingtip brewery in Hampshire. They’re based in Solihull and travel round the country to document excellent beer. I probably wouldn’t be able to keep up with them though. The pub itself is quite small, and is modelled in the style of a beer café; but its one room can make things very cramped if you’re not lucky enough to get a seat. But they do have an extensive bottled beer menu, which is what the Brummies threw themselves into as soon as they got there. But I thought the strength was a bit too much considering this was only our second stop. While I was here, I also tried a Shunters Pole from the Muirhouse Brewery in Derbyshire. Both beers were in better condition than than its sister pub, the Wellington.

Captain Correlli's Mandolin by Louis de Bernieres

Captain Corelli's Mandolin by Louis de Bernières
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This is a beautiful tale of love in a time of conflict; and there are great moments hilarious created from the stubbornness of the characters. After a large focus on the political picture of war-torn southern Europe (where there is a great monologue from the Duce of Italy), we are introduced to Pelagia and her father, and of their Greek traditions in Cephallonia. The novel solely focuses on the little people, of how no-one wants to fight the war and that it is forced upon all parties. Bernieres uses a combination of both first and third person narratives to tell his tale; so that we gain an understanding from all perspectives, and learn of their forbidden love, heartbreaks and ambitions. There are some great scenarios such as the unexploded mine, but also some tragic moments like the shooting of the Italian prisoners. The story ends with a heart-warming reunion of the lovers after so many years; albeit with its moments of comedy.

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West Midlands Burns Crawl: The Wellington, Birmingham

After informing the organiser that I was running late, I found out that the crawl wouldn’t be moving on for a good hour, which gave me time to catch up in the Wellington with a half of Jard from Fyne Ales. When I learnt that the next pub was just down the road at the Post Office Vaults, I thought it was hardly an inspired route of Birmingham, but dove right in and met my fellow crawlers. I tried to stay out of rounds as there were some heavy drinkers about, and didn’t to have to want to keep up. I also decided to stay at the low end of the beers, so my next beer was an interesting gingerbread mild from Riverhead brewery in Nottingham. These beers were ok, but probably weren’t being shifted enough which affects their beer quality, which is a shame as there were fourteen other beers to choose from. 

How old is my laptop?

As I concluded my investigations of my aunt’s computer, I started wondering just how old my machine is. It freezes at times but catches up slowly; and does have to re-load the odd web page every now and again but it’s battling through. The annoying thing is the screen, it just attracts so much dust, and also it’s very hard to see it in direct sunlight. I may need to get a blackout blind fitted, but when you compare it to other machines, it is considerably worse. So I started to google ways to tell how hold your machine is. Now the geeks out there have got really picky; are you looking for the date your bought your machine, the date that it was born, the date of each component; or the most user friendly obvious; when was it first turned on? How dork are you guys out there? I was told to check the receipt, check the BIOS file, run command prompts that loaded and vanished before I could read them, and check the hard drive properties. Eventually, I remembered that one of the first things that I did when I got my computer was to copy all my files from my old machine to the new one, and I checked a few of the photo folders which I knew to pre-date the machine and got the date from when I created the folders. So I’ve had it new from the shop for six years, and I don’t really care how long it was from the factory to the shop because I wasn’t using then.

It's survey time!

It’s survey time for the Good Beer Guide, and my plan was to pop over during a quiet period, ask the staff if all the details are up to date, sup a pint then catch up on my blogging. As soon as I walked through the door, I saw a couple I know having a meal. I waved to acknowledge them then headed straight for the bar, but then they came over and invited me to join us. So as soon as I’d finished questioning the staff, I headed over to watch them finish their meal. But they were very accommodating, and once they’d finished swapping food (which was quite an odd order, steak and mash with scampi and a corn on the cob) we got each other up to date. Before I left, I headed over to the bar once more to get a quick snapshot of their regular beers and cider and made a mental note of their prices.